


I Wanted You to Know

by Babettefanfic51



Category: DCU, The Flash (Comics), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Babies, Alternate Universe - Future, Alternate Universe - Twins, Character(s) of Color, Childbirth, Confessions, Dreams vs. Reality, F/M, Family Secrets, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Inspired By Tumblr, Memories, Near Future, Prophetic Dreams, Sexual Tension, Trust, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-21
Updated: 2014-12-13
Packaged: 2018-02-22 01:43:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 27,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2489855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Babettefanfic51/pseuds/Babettefanfic51
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Barry and Iris's friendship takes on a new dimension, much to the dismay of her Father.  This story and chapters to follow will basically be a re-write of the episode (mostly Westallen) with missing scenes and flashbacks or flash forwards.  I hope you enjoy it.  There'll be spoilers of prior events and upcoming or current episodes, so be warned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this first chapter, Iris, Joe, and Barry finally get a chance to talk about what's been happening over the past several weeks, particularly after Barry woke up from his coma. I hope you enjoy it. There will probably be spoilers of prior events and upcoming or current episodes, so be warned.

  
[](http://s190.photobucket.com/user/babettew54/media/Mobile%20Uploads/image_zps22edgljv.jpg.html)

Banner by HanaKT

_Chapter 1: Confessions_

After the events of the past several weeks, Iris had come to realize that she was thinking of Barry more than she should. She was concerned about him, especially after he had apparently died over and over again. Remembering that terrible time over the past nine months, made her uncomfortable, and not in a good way; she cared about him deeply.

After seeing him fight for his life, the doctors hovering over him, and then the electric shock to re-start his heart; it was too much. Tears blurred her vision. Shaking her head to remove those disturbing memories, she thought of his return to the living. Smiling she looked up and he was there smiling at her. Her heart lifted for the first time in months. He was alive, walking around and he was alright.

Thinking of their reunion, it was strange, but Barry was like a brother to her. As far back as she could remember, she was always covering for him, protecting him from her Father’s overprotectiveness. When he first came to them, she was a bit jealous of Barry. It had been her and her Father for so long, but then there he was right smack dabbing in the center of her life. She wanted to ignore him, but she didn’t really want to. It was impossible.

He was cute in a strange sort of way. He was sad most of the time. She wanted to cheer him up, but Barry was preoccupied with his Father, watching the news about the case, the trial, newspaper stories about that night. She even helped him collect most of those articles. It was awful seeing him like that, but she was his friend. She knew that to be true.

She came out of her musings, when he walked into the coffee bar. He did appear a bit frazzled and distracted as if he had other things on his mind. She then remembered the other day when he had stared at her as if he wanted to say something. Frowning, she’s seen that look from men before but dismissed it. _He didn’t think of me that way, did he?_

She knew her relationship with Eddie was wrong, but in a way, she was rebelling against her Father’s influence. He was overprotective, not only of Barry, but her as well. She understood and after the way her Mother had died, he only wanted to protect her. She adored her Father and didn’t want to hurt him, but she was having fun with Eddie. _Was that wrong?_

“Hey, you, what are you thinking?” Barry asked coming up to her.

“Oh, nothing,” she replied and picked up her order for a customer. “I’ll be right back. Don’t go anywhere.”

“I won’t,” he replied then watched her from a distance. Cocking his head to the side, he couldn’t help but stare. He couldn’t’ remember when his feelings for Iris had changed. Was it middle school, high school, college? Chuckling, it seemed as if these feelings had always been there. _Was that wrong?_

Glancing at him from underneath her lashes, there it was again, the same look from the other day. “I’m sorry, what did you say?” She asked turning back to her customer.

“I’ll have a medium latte and a pastry, please?”

“Of course, I’ll be right back.” She headed back to the counter. Taking a deep breath, she turned in her orders and came over to him. “I can see it on your face. Did you come here to apologize or are you finally going to tell me what is going on with you?” She asked then prepared drinks for her customers.

“I can see you’re busy, but yeah, I wanted to apologize for …” He hesitated.

“For being ‘busy,’ for brushing me off, for ignoring your offer to help me, for …”

He held up his hands. “I’m sorry, Iris, but … I’m here now.” He gave her a blinding smile.

Damn him, she thought. Her heart actually flipped at that look. She caved. “Alright, I’m almost done.”

“Great, I’ll wait for you right over there.” He pointed to a table over in the corner.

She shook her head at him then got back to work. A half hour later, it was time to leave. After returning to the counter, she had her things. “I don’t want to talk here. Are we going to the library?”

“No, I thought we would head over to the Lab,” he replied.

“Ok, but my Dad may stop by. I have to finish this assignment, Barry. It is due tomorrow morning.”

“Don’t worry, I have the evening off.” No sooner had he said that then a buzzing came into his head. It was Cisco.

_Barry, are you there? There’s a silent alarm at a jewelry store over on Main Street._

“Oh, no,” he whispered.

“What is it?” Iris asked.

“Could you meet me at the Lab? I have an errand. It’s your Dad.”

She frowned. “Alright, I do have my car.”

“Great; this won’t take long. Drive careful.” He smiled at her then hurriedly left the bar.

“I will,” she said distractedly. Frowning, she headed to her car and made her way to the Lab. While in her car, her Father called looking for Barry. She decided to cover for him. “I haven’t seen him since earlier today.”

“Well, tell him to call me when you see him,” Joe said.

“Sure, I’ll tell him.” She hung up. Now she was very suspicious. _Has Barry lied to me?_ The past several weeks came back into her mind. In particular, the incident at the reception when he had mysteriously vanished and she had found him outside on the ground apparently from fainting. _Could it be? No way was Barry the red blur that was streaking all over the city, saving people, rescuing people from burning buildings, dodging bullets from clones; it was insane, wasn’t it?_

It certainly would explain his absence from her life, his inability to keep an appointment, from forgetting to help her. She then dismissed it from her mind. It was utterly ridiculous. He’s just a kid. She shook her head. No, he’s not a kid, far from it. He towered over her and when she had grabbed his arm several times now, they were sturdy and reliable. She immediately stopped that train of thought.

“Barry, are you here?” She asked coming into the Lab.

“I’m right here. What took you so long?” Smiling, he walked over to her carrying two glasses of wine.

“What in the world? Barry, we have work to do. I don’t have time to …” She hesitated.

“It’s just one glass.” She put her bag down and he handed her the wine. “What should we drink to?”

She closed her eyes for a moment then she looked him in the eye. “The truth.”

He sighed and lowered the glass. “Iris, I …”

She put the glass down and walked over to the chalkboard and lifted up the screen that hid the various maps, notes, and newspaper clippings. “Barry, I know.”

His heart sped up. He wanted her to know so badly. “You know what?”

“I know how much you want to help your Father, to get him released.” He walked over to her. “You know you can trust me. I want to help you.”

“You’ve always helped me, Iris, from that first day I barged into your life, and…”

She glanced at the clippings again. “I admit at first I was a bit jealous of you.”

He frowned. “But why?”

“I know it was silly, but it was always my Dad and me and then you were there.”

He understood. “Iris, I … I’m sorry.”

“Please don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. You were just a kid. You needed us and to be honest, we needed you too.”

“Really?” He was entirely surprised.

“Yeah really; I got over my jealousy pretty quickly.” She glanced at him. “I liked you, Barry, maybe a bit too much.”

His heart soared then it pounded. “What are you saying?”

“Isn’t it obvious? I care what happens to you and these past few weeks … I’ve missed you.”

“Not that I’ve noticed,” he said feeling jealous of Eddie.

“Oh,” she said and went to pick up her wine. She took a sip. She did not want to talk about him.

He had to know. “Well, is it serious between you two?”

She sighed then she told him the truth. “He was there for me when I needed someone to talk to … about you. He was kind and he saw how miserable I was, and he was a friend.”

He swallowed. “Miserable?”

She shook her head and took another sip. “I know it was wrong.”

He walked over to her and took the glass from her and set it down. “No, it wasn’t wrong.” He squeezed her hand. “Iris, I have to tell you something.”

Her heart pounded. “What is it?”

“While I was in a coma, I heard every word you said to me.”

“You did?” Deeply moved, her eyes watered.

Closing his eyes, he raised her hand to his lips and kissed it reverently. “Yeah, I did. When I heard your voice, I wanted desperately to open my eyes. I wanted to come back for you, Iris, only for you.” He touched her cheek.  “Thank you for coming to see me and talking to me.” He had to say it. “I truly had no idea what would happen to me if you weren’t my friend, if you hadn’t believed in me, or tried to help me. I do need you in my life. Don’t ever forget that.”

“You truly mean that?” She stared into his eyes hoping he would tell her the truth.

“Yeah, I do; I honestly do,” he replied meaning it.

At that moment, Iris decided to wait for him to tell her the truth on his own. She knew he would, and she would be there for him as a friend and maybe something more? “I’m so glad,” she whispered. “Thank you, Barry.” Then she impulsively went into his arms, holding him close.

He was surprised at first then he hugged her tightly to him. Closing his eyes, he stroked and smoothed her hair. He couldn’t help but think that it was Iris, the one person who actually believed in him.

Iris closed her eyes, holding him close. They had only hugged a few times; after graduation ceremonies and at holidays when they had exchanged gifts. He was definitely different. She could feel it. His strong arms made her feel safe and dare she admit it, cherished and loved.

 Someone cleared their throat. It was Joe and he did not look happy.

 TBC!?

 ~o~o~

 A/N: Well, I had to write this little story for them. This ship is going to have a hard time in the fandom. I ship them for various reasons, not only that it is canon, but because they are cute and obviously care deeply for each other. Westallen will have to stay determined and concerned about each other from a distance, trusting in their future and what they feel. I’m along for the ride. I hope you enjoyed this story. I haven’t written any fan fiction since August. I won’t say I’m definitely back, but we’ll see if this story continues, if at all. Now tell me what you think. Reviews/kudos is love.


	2. Watch You Fade Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this next chapter, Barry, Iris, and Joe finally talk about what's been going on over the past several weeks. Unfortunately, things don't turn out quite the way they were expecting. WARNING: ANGST AHEAD.

_Spoilers:  Ep. 1.03 - Things You Can’t Outrun_

~o~o~

_Chapter 2:  Watch You Fade Away_

_Moments later, at the Lab:_

“What is going on in here?” Joe asked surprised and very suspicious.  _I thought she was dating Eddie._

Barry and Iris jumped apart.  They glanced at each other.  She quickly came over to him.  “Dad, now, it was just a hug.  Barry and I were talking and.”

He didn’t let her finish.  “Talking about what?”  Barry and Joe glanced at each other. 

“Dad, please don’t get upset.  We were talking about his Father and getting him released from prison; that’s all.”

“I don’t understand.  It’s police business.  I don’t want you involved in any of this.”

“Joe, just let me explain,” Barry began.

Iris interrupted him.  “Dad, none of this is Barry’s fault.  It’s yours.”

“My fault; what do you mean?”

She walked over to the chalkboard and pointed to the clippings.  “This right here; this is a family issue; not just a police issue.  You and Barry have been keeping the investigation a secret, but I don’t understand why.”  Then it dawned on her.  “I know what it is.  It’s because I’m a woman isn’t it?  You’re trying to protect me.”  She continued getting upset.  “Well, I don’t need either of you to protect me.  I’m not a child.  I can take care of myself.”

“Iris,” Joe began.

“Iris,” Barry began.

She held up her hands to stop them from speaking.  “I can’t believe you would keep this from me.  I thought we were a family.”  Her eyes watered feeling hurt.  “Just tell me why.”  She crossed her arms and waited for an answer.

When they just stood there not saying anything, she threw up her hands exasperated.  She walked over to her bag and pulled out her laptop.

“What are you doing?” Joe asked.

After pulling up her blog on the Streak, she pointed to it.  “Read this.”

They both walked over to the computer and silently read the articles.  Barry was impressed.  “These are pretty good.”

She nodded.  “Thank you.”

“How long have you been writing these?” Joe asked, curiously.

“Not long, several weeks, ever since his first save, I think.  The words just came,” she replied excited about her writing.

“Does this mean you’ve reconsidered being a journalist?” Barry asked, hoping that it was true.

“You’re very perceptive.  The answer is yes, I have.”  She shook her head impressed with the Streak.  “He’s incredible, isn’t he?  Can you imagine being able to run so fast that no one can describe what he looks like, only that his costume is red?  I think he’s extraordinary.  The more I write about him, the more I want to know.  Has he always been that way?   Are there any more out there like him?  Is he the only one?  Is he all alone?  The questions are endless.”  She felt a little sad about that.  Then she grinned, eyes lighting up, thinking about him.

Barry was enthralled.  The look in her eyes when she spoke about the Streak; his heart was racing. When she talked about him, a part of him felt so drawn to her, he had to blink and steady his breathing.

Joe cleared his throat.  Barry stood up straighter and stared straight ahead.  He was uncomfortable but not for reasons Joe was thinking.

Now she was becoming even more suspicious.  “Alright, tell me.  I can see you two are hiding something.”  Then it dawned on her; she pointed to the computer.  “Is it because of him, the Streak, plus the fact that he’s as fast as lightning and because he’s fighting criminals and rescuing people?”

Joe gave in.  “Yes, it’s because of him.  Barry has always believed that a man in the lightning strike killed his Mom and I believe him.”  He paused.  “Well, now I do.”

Barry grinned at Joe.  They both nodded.

“Well, then I think that’s great.  I mean, finally, we can have the answers that we need.”  She walked for a bit.  “I would give anything to be able to interview him, talk to him.  It would be the story of the century.”

“That it would,” Barry admitted.  “But he’s so fast and he hasn’t talked to anyone as far as I know.”

“That’s true, Iris, so maybe you should stick to other topics for your blog,” Joe said hoping to steer her away from the Streak.

Iris was shocked.  “Now you’re telling me what to write?”

“No, not exactly,” Joe replied and glanced down at his shoes.

“Do you feel the same way?” She asked Barry.

There was a painful pause.  “I think Joe is right at least for now.” Barry felt horrible.

“I see,” she said, so disappointed.  “Fine, I won’t bring it up again.”  She closed her laptop, stuck it inside her bag and put on her coat.

“You’re leaving, but what about your assignment?” Barry asked.

“I’m sure Eddie can help me,” she replied stiffly.  She pulled out her cellphone and called him.  “Hi, Eddie, are you free?  Great, I’ll be right over.”

Then she was gone.

Barry rubbed the back of his neck.  “Argh, this can’t go on.  We have to tell her.”

“No, not yet,” Joe replied and walked over to the chalkboard.  “We’ll tell her once we have more evidence.  It’s too dangerous.”

Barry knew he was right.  “I understand,” he finally said but he didn’t, not really.

“Barry, look at me.”  He turned to him.  “I know you care for her.”  At his apparent surprise, he continued.  “I’ve watched you two grow up, remember?”  Joe wanted to say more, but his cellphone rang.  “I have to take this.”  After a minute of listening, he said, “I have to go.  Remember what I said,” Joe reminded him sternly then left him alone.

“I’ll remember,” he whispered distractedly then he walked over to the wine glasses.  Her lipstick was on the glass. He picked it up.  And then without warning, his mind flashed back to the first time he had seen Iris kissing someone but it wasn’t him.  He had come home unexpectedly from his first year of college.  Hoping to surprise his family, he quietly entered the house expecting to see Joe and Iris welcome him home.  But when he opened the door what he saw would stay with him far longer than he cared to remember.

~o~o~

_Five years ago, the West house:_

He paid the cabbie, noticed a car in front of the house, one he'd never seen before, opened the front door, but no one was home.  He supposed he should have called first, but when he walked into the living room, Iris was there on the sofa kissing someone.  Too stunned to speak, he didn’t know whether to turn around and leave or run over there and snatch him away from her.

He finally managed one word, “Iris, IRIS?!”

She jumped up from the sofa, shocked to see him, “Barry, what are you doing here?” She glanced at the kissing partner.  He couldn’t believe he was caught.  It never happened.

“I live here, and who the hell is this?” Barry asked.

“Iris is this?” The kissing partner began.

“Yes, this is Barry.  Barry this is James and he’s … Ummm …tutoring me.”

Barry didn’t believe that, not for one second.  James was tutoring her alright.  He then decided to be cordial, but he wanted to knock the guy to the floor.  He held out his hand.  “Iris is my sister and you; you need to leave … right now!”  He gave the man a look meaning he was not to be played with.  Barry had already reached his full height, over six feet and some inches.

“Sure, dude, we were just playing around.”  He turned to Iris.  “I’ll see you at school.”  He left without a backwards glance.

Iris was shocked he would act this way.  “I can’t believe you did that.  You are not my Father.”

He ignored that remark.  “What the hell were you thinking?” Barry asked the furious young woman.

Iris sighed and sat down.  Frustrated, she ran her fingers through her hair.  “That’s just it; I wasn’t thinking.”

He could see she regretted her decision then he felt sorry for yelling.  He put down his things and sat down next to her.  He wanted to pull her close and tell her he was sorry, but he didn’t.  She needed to learn a hard lesson.  “Did Joe know about this?”  At her look, he answered his own question.  “Of course, he didn’t.”

She stood up and began to pace.  “You don’t have to say it; I know it was stupid.”  She turned to him feeling regretful.  “When you walked in, I realized I was making a mistake.”  Her eyes watered.  “Thank you, Barry.”

Her tears did something to him.  “Iris, don’t cry.”  He couldn’t help himself.  He walked over to her and pulled her close.  “Just think before you jump Ok, promise me?”

“I promise,” she whispered holding him close, not wanting to let go.

He didn’t want to either.

~o~o~

_Back to the present:_

Sighing to himself, he knew it did no good to remember those times.  But lately that was all he could think about.  The memories refused to leave him alone.  All he could see was Iris when she wasn’t dating, when it was just them.  He hated to think about other people who could come between his feelings for her.  He had resigned himself to these feelings years ago, but he knew he couldn’t act on them.

Then his eyes brightened when an idea came to him.  Maybe there was a way to see her, look out for her without her knowing about it?  She would get her much-wanted interview and the Streak could get closer to her.  He began to pace.  How could he do it?  There must be a way.  He decided to think on it, but the more he thought about it, the more he liked the idea.  It was certainly clear to him how much Iris admired the Streak.  To him, it now seemed inevitable that they would meet.

~o~o~

_The next day at STAR Labs:_

Barry, Cisco, and Caitlin were enjoying some takeout, when he received a call from Joe about mysterious deaths that had occurred inside a locked meeting room apparently bolted from the inside.  A few days later, the team figured out that the culprit was indeed a meta-human, intent on revenge.  He had targeted a judge and the criminals who had sold him out.  He was ready and willing to kill those he deemed responsible for exacting that revenge. 

According to Cisco and Caitlin, again it was the dark matter and antimatter released by the particle accelerator that was giving deranged peoples their powers.  Of course, Cisco gave him a unique name. ‘The Mist’ was now his moniker.

Barry’s abilities and his alone was the only thing that could stop him.  After he had almost died from the toxic gas, he remained firm in his resolve to stop him from killing again.  He stretched out his lightning speed even further than he could have imagined and it was enough to exhaust The Mist so he could be stopped.  He was now locked up inside a cell underneath STAR Labs, but of course they had no way of knowing how long it would hold.

It was now hours before dawn, and after saving Joe at the prison with an antidote, evading his Father’s curious looks, he was now asleep in a chair trying to get a few hours of rest.  He was awakened when Joe spoke to him.

“This brings back memories of watching you sleep,” he whispered with a grin.

Barry stood up, stretched and came over to him.  “Well, I’m all grown up now.”

“Yeah, you are,” Joe agreed.  He held up his hand; Barry took it.  They spoke without words.

Suddenly, Iris rushed in and Eddie was right behind her.  Barry realized he would have to hide his feelings yet again.  He hated this so much. He frowned at Eddie and tried to send daggers into his chest with a look.  Joe caught that look then frowned.

After giving her Father a hug, so relieved he was alright, she noticed Barry.  “Oh, hi Barry.”

“Iris,” he whispered then he thought it best that he left.  He hated seeing them together and the fact that it was happening far too often for his tastes, he decided to leave.  “I’ll just let you two talk.”  He nodded to Joe, then he left, but he was so tempted to listen to their conversation but decided against it.  Once outside, he needed to see his Dad so he streaked to the prison.

~o~o~

_A few minutes later, at the prison:_

Once he sat down, he picked up the phone and spoke to him.  “Joe is going to be Ok.”

Henry nodded.  “I had a feeling.  That guy in red, he was so fast.”

“Yeah, Joe told me what happened.”

Henry watched his son for a moment.  “Did I ever tell you about when you learned to walk?”

Barry chuckled.  “A few times,” he replied and waited for the story.

“All the babies in the neighborhood were running around but not you.  But your Mom was never worried.  She just said, ‘He’ll walk when he has somewhere to go.’  “You ran to her Barry, right into her arms.”

Barry nodded, unable to speak.  Tears welled up; he couldn’t stop them.

~o~o~

A little while later, as he was streaking back home, he thought of the past several days.  His inability to tell Iris how he felt, that he was the Streak, just everything about his life now.  He wondered if that secret would continue to keep them apart, keep her in someone else’s arms, but he knew that wasn’t the reason why Iris was seeing Eddie.

She needed him in her life.  He couldn’t fault her for that.  She needed someone to talk to, someone who understands her, through and through.  Maybe he wasn’t that person, at least not anymore.  He wanted so much for her to be happy more than anything even if that meant being with someone else.  The idea sent a sharp pain inside his chest that he skidded to a stop, looked around and wondered where he was.  He touched his ear.  “Cisco, Caitlin, Dr. Wells… anyone?”  He felt so alone.  Holding back tears, he slowly walked over to a tree, leaned against it and thought of the past several weeks. 

_I thought being the fastest man alive would make my life easier that I could outrun anything.  It turns out no one can out run the pain.  Life is tragic, but it’s also precious and sweet, and extraordinary.  The only way to honor my Mother is to keep running._

And so he did.  Streaking through town, he had made a decision.

_I can’t give up on her; I couldn’t even if I wanted to._

TBC!?

~o~o~

Song Inspiration:  _All Alone in Love_ , Mariah Carey.

A/N:  *wipes eyes* Well, this chapter was so difficult to write but putting even more barriers between them seemed to fit this story.  I so love Barry’s voiceovers.  As you can tell, I’ll probably be updating with a few scenes from prior events (and future episodes) so be conscious of spoilers.  I’ll add a warning just in case.  I hope you enjoyed this.  Please review or leave a kudo.  Thank you.

 


	3. Eyes Wide Shut

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Massive Spoilers: Ep. 1.04 – Going Rogue (aired) & Ep. 1.05 – Plastique (unaired).
> 
> Everything changes after this.

_Chapter 3: Eyes Wide Shut_

_Central City Police Station, a few days later:_

Iris had a dilemma on her hands. On the one hand, avoiding her family was not the answer. And with school, Eddie, her blog, and most of all, her suspicions about Barry were wearing her down; she needed to put those doubts from her mind.

She believed in him; always would. So, if he felt the need to keep this from her, then she had to find a way to wait, to trust, and to endure the agony of not knowing. And so, she made them some coffee, hoping in this one simple way, to show them that there were no hard feelings and that they could believe in each other and move forward.

"Happy break?" She cheerfully asked, walked over to them and held up two cups.

Barry knew what this about, a peace offering. Happy and smiling that she wasn't holding a grudge, he replied, "Thanks," and took a cup.

Her Father, however, was not so quick to make amends. "I'm off caffeine for a while," he muttered and walked away.

Sighing, she wanted to call him back but refrained.

"He'll come around; just give it time," Barry said hoping to make her feel better. He headed to the Lab and she followed him.

"I don't know, Barry. It's strange, but it's as if he still thinks I'm a child without a mind of my own. Take my blog, for example."

He stopped walking. "Yeah, about your blog, he has a point you know. There are all kinds of nut cases on the Internet."

"Please don't start that again. Nothing is going happen to me, besides it's anonymous."

"Ok, if you say so," he said, still worried about her.

"So, any new interesting cases?" She asked and followed him.

"No," he replied. "You know I can't talk about ongoing cases."

"Since when, you know you can tell me anything; I won't say a word."

"Right, but what about your blog? Anyone could see it and it could jeopardize the case?"

"Alright, alright," she replied. She had hoped to get a scope on the Streak.

Once they reached the Lab, there was a woman waiting for Barry.

She held out her hand. "Hi, Felicity Smoak."

Iris shook her hand. "Iris West," she said introducing herself.

"Barry Allen," he muttered then he felt silly. "But you both already knew that." He cleared his throat.

Iris was thoughtful. _Was Barry interested in her? He did seem flustered and nervous._ "Barry mentioned you after his trip to Starling City to investigate some strange case of his."

"Yes, it was strange, no question about that." Turning, she walked further inside the Lab. "Is this where it happened?" Felicity asked and pointed to the skylight.

"Well, Ummm," Barry hesitated. He didn't want to talk about that night. _I'm not sure if Felicity knows the truth about me._

Iris understood. It was pretty obvious they needed to talk. "I'll let you two get caught up." She left them alone.

Out in the hallway, Iris glanced back at the Lab and then slowly walked down the stairs, distracted by her thoughts. But then unexpectedly, memories returned of Barry and his first date with a girl.

~o~o~

_Seven years ago, the West house:_

Iris, Joe, and Barry were in the living room waiting for his first date to arrive. Of course, her Father would be their escort. Her name was Heather Anderson and Barry had a crush on her. He was sixteen and she was fifteen. They were going to the movies.

Iris couldn't help teasing him. "So, what do you know about Heather? Is she smart; does she get good grades? She's probably a cheerleader, right?"

 _Here it comes_ , Barry thought. "Of course, she does, and yes, she's very smart, and no, she's not a cheerleader," he replied. He smoothed his hair, feeling nervous.

Iris and Joe both raised an eyebrow.

He caught their looks and felt the need to pump up Heather's attributes. "Actually, she's a protégé. She's smart beyond her years, just like me."

Iris narrowed her eyes, not liking her at all. "So what; being smart doesn't make her perfect or anything."

"You don't even know her. She's a nice girl and I like her."

Joe was tired of this. Now was not the time. "Alright, you two, that's enough."

Barry and Iris both sulked, not looking at the other.

Moments later, the doorbell rang. "I'll get it." Joe opened the door. Heather and her Father walked in.

"Good evening, Mr. Anderson; Heather. Please come in," Joe greeted them warmly.

"Good evening, Sir," Heather said politely.

"Good evening, Mr. West, is it?" Mr. Anderson asked.

"Yes, it's Mr. West." They came into the living room.

Barry and Iris both stood up. Iris was still sulking. Heather was lovely; blonde and blue-eyed.

"Hi, Barry," Heather said and smiled.

"Hi, Heather," Barry said and swallowed, feeling awkward and unsure.

"Oh, I'm sorry, this is my daughter, Iris West," Joe introduced her.

She nodded. "Hi," Iris said her greeting a bit clipped.

"So, what movie are you going to see?" Joe asked.

"A sci-fi movie, but I'm not really into sci-fi, but I'll see this one," Heather replied.

Iris's mouth dropped open. _Barry is a complete nerd._

Barry was stunned. _She never said she wasn't into sci-fi._ He snapped out of it. "Well, I guess we should go."

"I'll have him back around eleven," Mr. Anderson said.

"Thanks, I appreciate it," Joe said and escorted them out. After he had shut the door, he rubbed the back of his neck. "Oh well, she is pretty."

Iris rolled her eyes. "Good luck, Barry. You are going to need it."

~o~o~

_Back to the present:_

Iris had to smile at the memories. They were always teasing each other. After high school, Barry's future lady friends never seemed to meet his standards. He was picky, for lack of a better word. He made it a point to find out as much as he could about the girls whom he asked out on a date.

Iris did the same. She did learn a valuable lesson. Her near miss with James woke her up to what guys wanted from girls, but not all men were like that. She did date a little in high school and a bit in college, but it seemed like a waste of time to her. She had her studies and they seemed to take precedence over everything else.

Once back at the coffee bar, she decided to set up Barry and Felicity at Jitters to have some fun. She seemed perfect for him. She definitely had the look and she was very smart, and most of all, Barry was his nervous and stammering self around her, which in her mind, definitely sent up matchmaking bells.

~o~o~

_The West house, after their double date:_

Eddie had returned from his assignment and they were watching television. Eating popcorn, he became amorous but apparently Iris was not in the mood. He leaned over and kissed her cheek, her ear, and her throat. "Eddie, it's late." She immediately got up and walked into the kitchen.

"Whenever things become intimate between us, you always say that."

She watched him for a moment. "I hear an 'and' coming."

It was a sore subject. "Never mind."

She thought he understood. "You know how I feel about pre-marital sex."

"You mean you don't want to have sex with me." It was a statement.

"I told you, when I'm ready, I'll be ready." She did not want to discuss it. Ever since her talks with Barry and her Father, sex was something that meant a lot to her. Casual sex was not what she wanted in her life, and if Eddie didn't understand that, then she said it again, "It's late. I'm tired and I have classes in the morning."

He came over to her. Eddie couldn't lose her; he couldn't. "I'm sorry, Iris, it's just I want you. You know that, but I'm willing to wait."

Inwardly sighing, she said, "I know you are." Then she gave him an out. "We're not exclusive; I mean if you want to see other girls?"

He took her by the shoulders. "That is not what I want. This is what I want." And then he leaned in for a kiss.

She kissed him back but only for a moment. "Goodnight, Eddie."

"Goodnight, Iris." He left the house, walked down the steps and thought about the last few weeks. Ever since Barry woke up, things have been different. _Was Iris pulling away from me? I can't let that happen._

A few hours later, Iris was in bed but her thoughts were of Barry and his friend Felicity. She did seem perfect for him. She wanted him to find that special someone, and she was sure he wanted the same thing for her. She stifled a yawn; feeling exhausted. The entire day had been emotionally draining. A few days ago, she was thoroughly convinced that Barry was the Streak, but now on second thought, it may not be true.

Thinking about her family, they were concerned about her welfare, but she felt compelled to do this; to write her blog. A part of her felt as if this blog could be her way into a writing career. She knew she had a lot to learn, but her writing courses did not seem as boring as before.

Minutes later, her eyes drifted shut. Her dreams were of a future where her writing was something that caused people to sit up and take notice.

Maybe it wasn't a dream after all.

~o~o~

_A few days later at STAR Labs:_

It was all over the news about a mysterious individual blowing up buildings. There was no evidence to indicate arson or explosive devices of any kind, leading the team to believe that someone special, meaning a meta-human may have caused the explosions. The police, firemen, and arson investigators were completely baffled.

After one particular incident, and after viewing video feeds, the team was able to identify a woman coming from a burning building. Her face wasn't visible, but it was definitely a woman and her hair was red.

"Well, this is a first," Caitlin commented. "I have to wonder if maybe it wasn't the particle accelerator that caused her to be this way."

"We may never know if we can't stop her. How are we going handle this? She's very powerful if she can blow up a building using … however, she's doing it." Cisco wasn't coming up with any answers. Of course, he had given her a name. Plastique seemed to fit perfectly.

Barry was thoughtful. He walked for a moment. "Only this last explosion was far too close to Jitters where Iris works. And if I don't stop her, then." He couldn't finish. He was extremely concerned for Iris's welfare, and so was Joe.

After another day of not finding her, a young woman walked into Jitters and took a seat. She was obviously homeless, if her clothing were any indication. She also looked very young, mid-or late teens.

Iris took pity on her and offered her a beverage and a pastry. The young woman seemed polite and very thankful. Once getting her meal, Iris headed back to the counter and immediately called her Father.

Ten minutes later, Joe shows up but the young woman was gone. "What did she look like?" Joe asked, extremely concerned.

"She was young, late teen's maybe, red hair, which was long and flowed out from her hoodie, but she was definitely homeless. I offered to help her, but she refused to stay," Iris replied.

"Just tell me what she was wearing; we'll find her."

Iris then told him she was wearing jeans, a black hoodie, tennis shoes striped with blue and white, plus she had a backpack. It was also dark, no lettering that she could see. "Is she the one you're been looking for that's causing the explosions?" Iris asked.

"Yes, it may be her. I'll need a video feed from the past few hours. But if you see her again, please call me."

"Of course, I will," Iris said and watched him leave.

~o~o~

Once returning to his car, he informed Eddie of his concerns. "She couldn't have gotten far." He then radioed the station and had any officers close by to canvas the area looking for more clues.

"Why is she doing this, blowing up buildings and causing damage? It's a miracle no one was hurt," Eddie commented.

"But if she continues at this rate, someone is going to get hurt." Joe glanced at Jitters, thinking of Iris. Then he made a decision.

After returning to the station, and entering his private office, he called Barry. He immediately picked up Joe's concern.

"I see what you mean, but," Barry began.

"Barry, listen, I think Iris's blog is connected to these bombings."

"Why would you think that?" Barry was doubtful about the connection. "Iris said that her blog was anonymous."

"I can't be sure, but her blog may have led people to believe that she knows you or that you confide in her. I don't know; it's just a hunch, but maybe this person wants to draw you out." There was a pause. "You have to convince her to delete her blog and to stop writing about you. She won't listen to me. It has to be you."

Barry wasn't convinced he should reveal himself. "But she'll know it's me."

"I realize that, but you know it's only a matter of time before she figures it out. This way, we can protect her and once the blog is down, she'll be safe. It's the only way."

"Joe, she's not going to be happy about this. She'll hate us for lying to her," Barry said. The idea of Iris hating him made him sick to his stomach.

"I know Barry, but we're family and we protect each other no matter what. She'll understand and forgive eventually." Joe actually believed that.

"I hope you're right." He was so worried about losing her. She had to be safe and if that meant she wouldn't be able to trust him anymore, then it was the price he was willing to pay. He could live with that. What he couldn't live with was losing her in some horrible way.

Heading to the coffee bar, he thought of Eddie. He'd asked around and apparently they hadn't dated that long, only a few months. There was something about him. It wasn't truly jealousy that caused these feelings. He just did not trust him.

He knew without a shadow of a doubt that everything was going to change after this night. Whether for good or bad, he wasn't sure. Then Felicity's insightful words came into his mind:

_I've seen firsthand what this life can do to people. It's a lonely path; don't make it lonelier than it has to be._

~o~o~

_Later that night at Jitters:_

It was nearly ten o'clock and it was Iris's turn to close up shop. Going over her list of things to do before closing, she didn't realize that she was being watched.

Then she heard something. "Is someone there?" She slowly stood up, looked around and there standing in a dark corner was a man. Her heart began to pound. "What do you want? There's no money here; it's all gone." Silence greeted her. "Please leave or I'm calling the police." She reached for her cellphone, but just as she was about to dial 911, he came out of the shadows.

"It can't be." He came closer then she gasped. "It's you!"

TBC!?

~o~o~

Song Inspiration: _Between the Lines_ , Sara Bareilles.

A/N: Well, that should hold you for two weeks! This chapter stretched out the plot just a little. I gathered from spoiler photos for Episode 1.05 that they would confront each other. Not sure what will happen next, or if they will actually speak. I'm hoping that they will. If you would like to see the pictures, head over to SpoilerTV. The next update will be a little delayed because of the two-week break for the series. Please review and/or leave a kudo.

Just a thought: I hope that Iris 'won't' recognize him. If she does, it could slow the momentum of the show. People will say that she's blind for not seeing who he really is, but I don't think that's a bad thing. In the context of how things are progressing, she's been blind to Barry's feelings for years, so I don't think it's a stretch at all.

Thank you for reading!


	4. What We Feel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this next chapter, we have a shared memory and a future where what they feel takes precedence over everyone and everything else.

First off, this is an interim chapter, so there are no spoilers. Read on.

_Chapter 4: What We Feel_

_A shared memory - over ten years ago:_

Today was Barry's first day of school since his Mother had died. It would be a difficult day for him, not only because of that, but he would be attending a different school, with new teachers and kids he didn't know. Barry was entering sixth grade and Iris would be in the fifth grade.

Once they boarded the bus, Barry entered a different world. Looking out the window, the world he resided in was just a dream; a world where his Mother was still alive and his Father was out of prison, but none of that was real.

Iris was very sympathetic. She touched his arm. "Are you Ok?"

Just to hear her voice made him feel a little better. He turned to her and tried to smile. "I'm Ok."

"Are you sure? I could come with you to make sure you're in the right classes?"

"No, I'll be alright." Barry wasn't so sure about that. Making friends was difficult for him. "Iris, you haven't forgotten what we talked about have you?" He whispered.

Iris was confused. They talked about everything. "No, what was it?"

"My first name?" He leaned in even closer. "Bartholomew?"

Iris grinned. "Oh, that; I won't say a word; I promise."

Relieved, he looked out the window. "Good."

Once at the school, they found their classrooms without any problems. With different last names and of a different race, no one assumed that they knew each other or that they were being brought up together. It was their secret to share, but they loyally guarded that secret.

Lunchtime came several hours later. Iris found her old friends, but Barry had a hard time making friends. She saw him all alone eating by himself. "Barry, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Barry answered, depressed. He picked at his food.

"That's not true. Come and sit with us." She glanced at her friend and then introduced her. "This is Jasmine. Jasmine, this is … a close friend, Barry."

"Hi, Jasmine," Barry said. "It's nice to meet you."

"Hi, Barry. Do you want to eat with us?" Jasmine asked.

He wanted to make new friends. "Sure, I'll come," Barry replied and followed them.

Three other girls were already seated and then they welcomed Iris and her friends. Barry, Iris, and Jasmine took a seat. Iris introduced him and then everyone ate their lunch. Now, everyone was talking about school, their teachers, and starting school again.

A few minutes later, a few boys who had traveled with them on the school bus didn't like what they had seen, especially Iris and Barry together. An older boy, named Adam, watched their interaction and snickered a vulgar word loud enough for Barry to hear. He heard every hateful word. Iris also heard them.

One boy who knew Iris didn't approve of any of it. "Dude, that's not cool." Although he wanted to be a part of this clique, he didn't like some of the things Adam said.

"Shut up, James, no one was talking to you," Adam said and glared at him.

"Barry, don't mind them. Let's finish eating. Don't pay them any attention." Iris knew those boys, always starting trouble and puffing out their chests.

Adam, along with two other boys, came over to them apparently ready to start trouble. They stood at the head of the table where Barry was sitting. "You know you're sitting in my seat. Get up!" Adam sneered.

"You know that's not true. Anyone can sit wherever they want!" Iris raised her voice.

"I'm not surprised you have girls fighting your battles," Adam sneered teasing him.

"I'm not going to fight you," Barry said as calmly as he could, considering he could not remember ever being so mad.

Jasmine didn't like what was happening, so she ran to get the Vice Principal, Mrs. Johnson, who was just down the hall.

Iris thought it best that they left. If Barry were to fight him, he could get thrown out of school. "Let's go, Barry!"

Barry stood up then he was caught off guard and knocked to the floor with a punch to his jaw.

Iris was furious. Adam was a jerk; everyone knew it. "Leave him alone!" She hauled off and punched Adam as hard as she could. He fell to the floor, clutching his jaw. His buddies' mouths were agape. Adam would never live this down, being bested by a girl.

The teacher arrived moments later. "What is going on here?"

Iris spoke up first. "Mrs. Johnson, Adam and Barry were … Ummm … showing each other these moves from this video game and things got out of hand. Right, guys?"

Barry slowly stood up, glanced at Iris and Adam. "Yeah, that's what happened."

Adam was relieved. "No hard feelings?" He held out his hand, hoping to save face.

Barry shook his hand. "Sure, no hard feelings."

"Alright, shows over!" Mrs. Johnson announced. The bell rang. "Time for class!" Mrs. Johnson was not surprised that Adam was involved. She would handle him later.

"Iris, before you go back to class, come with me." Mrs. Johnson left the cafeteria. Glancing at Barry, Iris followed her. Barry didn't know what to do. He had to get to class, but none of this was Iris's fault. He decided to follow them.

Once inside her office, and taking a seat, Mrs. Johnson had a question for her. "Did you hit Adam?"

"Well, I …" she hesitated.

"Iris, I saw what happened." She watched her for a moment. "Do you want to tell me your side of the story?"

Barry barged in without knocking. "Mrs. Johnson, it's my entire fault; please don't blame her. She was just looking out for me."

Mrs. Johnson wasn't sure what was going on. "You two know each other?"

"Yes, we do," Iris replied. "Barry is living with us. He lost his Mother recently and his Father …" She hesitated.

"My Father is in prison. They said he killed my Mom, but it's not true. He didn't do it," he said becoming emotional.

"Barry?" Iris began and reached for him.

"I see," Mrs. Johnson murmured. "Sit down, Barry."

"But I have to get to class, and …"

"Don't worry about that. I'll give you a pass." He sat down. "Well, Iris, I will have to inform your Father about this."

"Please don't call him!" Iris knew she would be punished for a long time; maybe a very long time.

"I'll take the blame, Iris; don't worry," Barry said.

Mrs. Johnson was amazed how they stood up for each other. She then changed her mind. "Alright, I won't call him, but consider this a warning."

They both sighed with relief, so very grateful. "Thank you, Mrs. Johnson," they chorused together.

She then wrote up passes for them. "Go on now; get to class."

They quietly left her office and headed to class. Iris was having second thoughts about not telling her Father about this. She hated keeping secrets from him.

As if reading her thoughts, Barry said, "We should tell him."

"Are you sure? He'll ground us for months or years," Iris said, sincerely concerned about their punishment.

Barry was worried too, but he decided not to show it. "It won't be so bad. Look at this way; if we're grounded, you can finally find the time to study ghosts, zombies, werewolves, witches, aliens, and …" Barry stopped at her look.

"Hold on a second; did you say aliens?"

"Come on, Iris, anything is possible."

"But aliens, Barry; I don't know about that." Iris wasn't sure if he were serious or not.

"You'll love it; just you wait and see," Barry said, getting excited.

Iris wasn't enthusiastic. She didn't believe in any of that stuff. Frowning, they headed to class, but then she knew she was in trouble.

_If there was one thing I know about Barry is once his mind was set, there was no changing it._

~o~o~

_In the not too distant future:_

Barry had moved out a few months ago. It's now been nearly a year since Iris had found out the truth about him. Since then, they confessed their true feelings. His superhero duties took up a lot of his time, so this was their time to get closer. At this moment, with her sad eyes and loving glances, he found himself lost in her eyes.

They had just returned from a rather brisk ride on the outskirts of the city. Her eyes were sparkling and her hair was a bit windblown. He reached to smooth it down, but Barry feared that if he didn't leave her now, he didn't think he could stop himself from taking her, right there. Joe was on their side but to come home and to see them like this, they were asking for trouble but it didn't seem to matter to them.

He leaned down just for a quick goodnight kiss, but he should have known better and then she said the one thing he was dying to hear.

"Don't go," she murmured with a look that sent his heart to pounding and other parts of his body reacted as well.  But he found the strength to remove her arms from his neck.

"Iris, we shouldn't."

"Why shouldn't we? We may never have another chance to be together like this. We're always so busy lately with finals, both your jobs, my job, and…"

"We just have to be patient, Iris, just for a little while." He wanted to propose and wait for their wedding night, but she was so beautiful and he did need her.

As if reading his mind, she whispered, "But Barry, please, I need you. Don't you need me too?"

After that telling question, he closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them, he touched her cheek, her throat and then even lower.

Iris closed her eyes and waited.

His voice hoarse, he whispered, "You don't know what you're doing to me, Iris." He raised eyes to her face and waited for her to look at him. "I desire you more than life itself."

She surprised him by saying. "Isn't that what life is about, lovemaking, being a part of someone, no matter how short or long it lasts?"

He nodded his head in total agreement, and then he was kissing her and this time was different; she could feel it. Desire flowed through her veins making her dizzy for more. He picked her up and took her upstairs. It was a little strange being there in her room.

Everything was different now. They were adults and they were in love. Barry was inexperienced, but he knew enough to know that foreplay was what made lovemaking special for a woman.

Setting her down, he closed and locked the door. She smiled flirtatiously at him. His heart melted at her look. He'd dreamed of this moment. Coming closer, he pulled her to him then nibbled her ear and down her throat. Her blouse was pushed aside and so was her bra. He stared at her chest and wondered again how lucky he was to have Iris in his life. He then tentatively licked her nipple with his lips and tongue causing her to moan and sigh at his ministrations. He increased his movements.

"That feels so good, don't stop," she whispered.

Her hands were in his hair encouraging him to continue and he did. He moved closer to the bed and then they helped each other undress and then they climbed under the covers.

He pulled her tightly to him loving her in his arms. They both felt as if they had come home at last. "We'll take it slow, alright?"

"I'm yours Barry, always. Do whatever you want with me." She paused and smiled at him. "I love you."

"I love you too," he whispered eyes watering. Barry thought he might lose it with those words. To be able to say it freely knowing that she felt the same way sent such joy inside his heart that he had to stop for a moment. Then he was kissing her desperately hoping to show her just how much he loved her and needed her.

Iris met his hunger with her own, kissing him back, digging her fingernails into his back, pulling him closer until he was top of her. His lips and tongue returned to her breasts and Iris thought she would never tire of the sensation. This is what heaven feels like; she was sure of this.

And then he whispered to her, "Open for me."

Her legs opened on their own accord and then he touched her. He closed his eyes as her heat and moisture met his fingers. He slowly entered her warmth swirling and moving in and out.

He kissed her again to cover her cries fearing someone may hear her. She opened her eyes when she felt his body leave her. "Barry?"

He put on a condom. "I'm here. I love you, Iris, always." He stroked her hair.

She smiled. "I know you do."

He returned her smile, then he kissed her passionately bringing forth more moans and sighs and then he felt the time was right. Her beautiful head was thrown back on the pillow, ready for his next move as she licked her dry lips. Her eyes opened briefly then she pulled his head down and kissed him thoroughly.

He kissed her over and over taking deeper and deeper tastes. She came into his arms whimpering her need. His lips moved down her neck where he sucked lightly at her skin, and she tilted her head to the side to give him more access. Iris knew his need, felt his hunger in the intensity of his kisses. His excited moans and rapid breathing fueled her own desire and she clung to him, trying to pull him closer. His fingers moved over her center, as Iris gasped into his mouth and arched her back. "Please!"

That word, coupled with her tugging motion on his erection, finally galvanized him into action. He positioned himself at the entrance of her body and thrust home in one smooth glide. And then he was kissing her again, his mouth slanting across hers in a deep, consuming kiss as he began to slowly move in and out of her lush body. He loved her, needed her with every fiber of his being and knowing that she returned that love with an equal intensity made his heart swell with unparalleled joy.

Iris felt the fire burn low in her belly and it grew hotter as he pulled out a little then slowly pressed back into her. He repeated the motion over and over again and she moaned loudly then, in pleasure this time; he was certain. The words were there and he had to say it, "I love you so much."

"Oh Barry, yes," she whispered stroking him and kissing anywhere her lips could reach. She began that climb toward climax and Barry was with her every step of the way. She clung to his shoulders as his rhythm increased, riding the crest of his passion.

"Barry!" She cried out as her climax burst upon her, washing over her in waves. He continued to kiss her deeply drawing out the sweetness of their lovemaking for long moments. He slowly left her body, removed the condom, reached for a towel and cleaned them up a bit. He rolled to his back bringing her with him and held her close to his side.

"Are you alright, Iris?" He had to ask as he stroked her arm and kissed her temple.

"I'm alright." She snuggled closer. She was sore, but it wasn't too bad. Suddenly and inexplicably, Iris's mind flashed back to those horrible months when Barry was in a coma and she couldn't reach him. Then she started to cry.

"Iris, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"I just ... just keep seeing you lying there and I ..." She couldn't finish.

"It's alright. I'm here now. Please don't cry." Pulling her closer, he kissed her forehead. "Go to sleep. Everything is fine now. We're together now, really together, and no one will come between us ever again."

"I believe you." She quieted down after a few sniffles.

Barry slowly turned his head, looked out the window at the beautiful night of stars and wondered again how strange it was for them to be together like this. A part of him had accepted it long ago, but Iris took a bit more time. He knew now that this was inevitable, their coming together. It was meant to be.

Iris sighed against his chest and whispered his name. She was asleep in minutes.

Barry was in heaven. He knew he would have to leave soon, but he didn't want to let her go; not now, not ever.

TBC!

~o~o~

Song Inspiration: _Butterflies Don't Lie_ , Kaci Battaglia.

A/N: Awwww, I love them so much. I hope you enjoyed this look into their past and their future. Hurry up, Nov. 11. I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave a comment. Thank you for reading.


	5. You and You Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this next chapter (the largest so far), the Flash and Iris meet face to face. Although this episode tore my heart out with their last talk, their conversation on the rooftop solidified my love for this ship. And no matter what may happen in the future, they will find their way back to each other. And yes, there are spoilers (Ep. 1.05) and there is angst, a fair amount of it too. Read on! :D

_Chapter 5: You and You Alone_

_Back to the present, the day before_ :

Iris West had always considered herself a practical person.  She didn’t believe in ghosts, witches, vampires, werewolves, aliens, or any of that supernatural mumbo gumbo that Barry talked about incessantly.  But that was before he walked into her life, or should that be streaked into her life?

She would never forget that moment, of seeing him for the first-time streak up the side of a skyscraper, and then streaking back down.  In awe at what she had seen, she didn’t know what to think now.  What else was possible?  She could actually hear Barry’s voice inside her mind … Iris, anything is possible.  Even her chosen line of study dealt with facts and the truth, not conjecture and science fiction, but now she believed him; he was right all along.

Moments later, there he stood before her.  “You are real.”  She looked him up and down; he was impressive, but his face was unrecognizable and then he was gone.  Spinning around, she couldn’t help but stare at the yellow streak of lightning fly down the alley. 

At the coffee bar the following evening, and after witnessing his incredible feats of speed and endurance, it was as if she was looking at the world through a pair of new prescription glasses.  She could see everything differently and clearly for the first time in her life.  _I can’t stop thinking about him_.  She was brought out of her musings when she heard a swishing sound. 

Turning at the sound, there he stood.  “Oh my god, it’s you!” 

Barry had to disguise his voice.  “Iris West, I hear you’ve been writing about me.”

Shaking her head to clear it, glancing at dirty dishes on the table, she said, “I need to clean up and.”  No sooner had she said that, she blinked and the shop was cleared of any dishes.

“Meet me on the roof.  I’ll give you a head start.”  He actually winked at her.  Barry had never felt so free to be able to flirt with her like this.  When he was near her as his self, he was always pretending they were just two friends who cared very deeply, but never crossed that line.

Iris blinked and wondered if she imagined it.  Breathless and excited, she ran toward the stairwell and took the stairs two at a time. She reached the rooftop, but he wasn’t there.

“I need you to stop writing about me.”  He used his vibrating voice again. It was loud but very different, like an echo, but he had to stay far away from her.  He was afraid to get too close, but he desperately wanted to cross that line.

A little out of breath, she turned and saw him casually sitting on a low-hanging roof.  Iris’s mind was spinning with so many questions.  She didn’t have a lot of experience interviewing people, just a few assignments from her classes.  If she could just focus on asking a few important questions, then everything would be okay.

She thought it best to tell him how important he was so she stroked his ego.  “There are a lot of people who need someone like you right now; to know that you’re out there.”  Still a bit breathless, she said, “I have so many questions.”  She watched him streak to the other end of the roof.  “Where are you from?"

“I can’t say,” he replied.

“Who are you?”   _He is wearing a mask_ , she thought, feeling a little silly.  If her heart weren’t beating triple time, then maybe she could think clearly.

“I can’t tell you that either.”  He sounded a little sad to her ears.  He streaked again and he was standing far enough away but his face was still a blur. 

“How can you do what you do?”  Iris had a feeling he wasn’t going to answer any of her questions.  Silence followed.  She sighed.  “You’re a terrible interview.”

He streaked again then he was standing a few feet away.  “There’s more to this than you can understand.  Just trust me, please.  I need you to stop.”

She felt exactly the same way.  She couldn’t stop writing about him and he couldn’t stop helping people.  “Can you stop … running into buildings, rescuing people without them knowing that you were there?”  She sensed they were alike in some strange way.  Maybe he was afraid of her but she was afraid he would run away.  Who knew if they would ever meet again? 

“I don’t do this for the glory,” he replied.  _If Iris knew it was me, that question would not have been asked._

“Then why do you?”  She asked, needing to know.

Without answering her, he streaked again and he was standing directly behind her about two feet away.  He was so close.  She wanted to turn and look into his face, but of course, it would be blurred the same as it had been before.  Now she was getting suspicious again.  She must know him; that was the only explanation, but she could be wrong.  _Stop thinking about Barry_ , she chastised herself.  He probably blurs his face when anyone gets too close.  Taking a deep breath, she had to make him understand how important he was to everyone; not just her.

With her back to him, she began her story praying he would help her.  “Look, I have this friend and he had something terrible happen to him when he was a kid. And his whole life he’s been telling stories about this impossible thing. And people laughed at him. And shrinks’ analyzed him. And he’s been searching for an explanation ever since. But now suddenly it’s like he’s lost his faith. But you—you are proof that he wasn’t crazy.”

Barry was completely stunned.  _She’s doing this for me_.  Like a moth to a flame, he came closer, but to him, it wasn’t close enough.  His heart was beating so fast; it was scary and very exciting.  Coming ever closer, she turned to him.  He bowed his head.

She whispered to him.  “Help me save my friend.”  She was begging now.  Barry was everything to her.  She had to help him.  Thinking about him, her eyes watered.

He blurred his face then looked into her eyes.  “He’s a lucky guy.”  Then he was gone.

 _Don’t go_ , she thought.  _Please don’t go._

~o~o~

 _Later that night, at the West house_ :

It was nearly midnight, but Iris couldn’t sleep.  Her interview with the Streak was less than successful.  He wanted her to stop writing her blog, but so did her Father and Barry, as well.  Normally, it wouldn’t send up red flags, but the Streak was also concerned about her, but he didn’t even know her.  But he did know her; that was the only thing that made any sense.

Now, she had a headache.  Thinking about all of this made her a little crazy and it was exhausting, having all of these doubts about her family keeping things from her.  Putting her laptop aside, she went into the bathroom and took a pill for her pounding head hoping to relax so she could get some rest.

 _Hours later, she drifted off into a restless sleep_ :

In the middle of a dream, an idea where the Streak was holding her and they were flying across endless space so fast that the landscape was a complete blur.  She tried to focus on his face, but she couldn’t no matter how hard she tried. 

Her mind and heart believed it knowing deep inside that it was better this way.   She could feel the wind in her hair as they floated past trees and buildings.  The feeling was indescribable.  She never wanted it to end, but soon enough she found herself at home in her living room.  The Streak was there standing before her.  She didn’t question it but accepted it wholeheartedly.  Then she reached out to touch the lightning bolt on his chest. 

He reached for her but when she looked up into his face, expecting to see a blurred face but it was Barry standing before her and he wasn’t wearing a red costume. 

“Barry?” She whispered in a dream.  He backed away from her.  “Don’t go,” she said aloud.  “Please, don’t go,” she whimpered.

“Iris!?” Barry said as he rushed into her room.  He heard her cries and he suspected she was dreaming; of him, maybe?  He decided to awaken her.  He touched her shoulder.

“Barry?”  She woke up and her cheeks were wet.  She was so confused that she didn’t know where she was.  _Now he’s invading my dreams_ , she thought.  She was wide awake now.  She wiped at her eyes and pulled the sheet up to her chest.  “What are you doing in here?”

“I heard you cry out and I was worried.  You said, ‘Don’t go; please don’t go.’  Do you want to tell me about the dream?  It may help.”

She lay back down and turned her back, not wanting to talk about the Streak.  “You must have been mistaken.  It’s late.  Goodnight, Barry.”  She wanted him to leave, but she didn’t really want him to go.

“Iris, I’m sorry, but we need to talk.”

She sighed and sat up.  “Go on, but I swear if you bring up my blog again.”

He bowed his head.  “I’m sorry, Iris, but,” he hesitated.  After learning that she had added her name and face to her blog, things were desperate.  He had to convince her to take it down.

She had a feeling she knew what was coming.  “Go on.”

He sat down next to her.  “I was working a case, someone I wanted to help, a friend, but … they died.”

“Barry, I’m so sorry.”

“I didn’t know her that well, but it still hurt.”  He paused as he stared at her.  “As bad as I feel right now, I know it would be far worse to lose someone whose family.” 

She was right.  Jumping out of bed, she slipped on a robe and walked over to the window.  He followed her.

“Iris, writing about this, putting your name out there; it’s dangerous, so I’m asking you one last time, please stop.”

She turned to him, more determined than ever to find out the truth.  “And I’m asking you one last time to tell me what is going on with you?”   He bowed his head.  “Why am I the only one of us who’s interested in this?”

He turned from her and rubbed the back of his neck.  His urge to tell her the truth was so strong that it hurt him to his soul not to tell her.  He glanced around her room, so many memories.  He walked over to the side table and picked up the photo of them together.  He brought up a sad smile.  It was taken after his graduation from college.  “I’ve always loved this picture.”

“Barry, please just … tell me the truth, please.” Her thoughts inexplicably returned to her talk with the Streak.  It hurts to beg, but if begging and pleading were the only way then, she would do it. She wiped at the corner of her eyes.

Sighing heavily, he put the photograph down and turned to her.  “I guess all of this stuff with my family; I finally just put it behind me.  I’m asking you to also.”

She didn’t believe him; he was lying.  More determined than ever not to stop, she pulled her robe tighter together.  “That may be how this all started, but it’s about something more than that for me now.  Whoever this Streak is, wherever he comes from, I am not stopping until the rest of the world believes in him.”

He hadn’t expected any less from her.  They were at an impasse.  It was time to put some distance between them.  “Maybe we shouldn’t see each other for a while.”

Her vision blurred.  There was a painful pause. “Yeah.”

He wanted to say more.  One last look at the photograph, then he was gone.

A full minute of stunned silence then her shoulders began to shake; she started to cry.  She was devastated.  Picking up her computer, she placed it on the bed.  Tears streamed down her face, she pulled up her blog.  There were so many hits asking questions about the Streak.  Pulling herself together, she blew her nose and wiped at her eyes.

Ten minutes later, her Father poked his head in. “Iris, I thought you would be asleep.”  He walked further inside and saw her blog. “Oh,” he whispered.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Iris, it’s late, finish that in the morning.”  He watched her continue to type.  “Is it that important?”

“You know it is,” she replied, still typing.

He didn’t want to fight with her.  “You need your rest.”  He sighed.  “Goodnight, Iris.”

“Goodnight, Dad.”

~o~o~

_Ten minutes earlier, on the front porch:_

Joe was surprised to see Barry coming from the house, but the look on his face gave him pause.  “Barry, what’s happened; what’s going on?”  He glanced at the house.  “Is it Iris?  Did you convince her to delete her blog?”

He stood up straighter.  “No, I didn’t.”

“I don’t understand.  She always listens to you.”

“Not this time.  I even tried to convince her that I had given up my search for the truth about my parents that night; that I had dropped it.”

“Oh, no, Barry; that was the last thing you should have said.  She knows how much it means to you to find the truth about that night.  And for you to say it’s not important anymore?  I’m not surprised she stood her ground.  Barry, she knows you’re lying.”

“I didn’t know what else to say.”  He rubbed his eyes to stem the flow of tears.  “My worst fears are coming true, Joe.  This secret is tearing us apart, and I don’t think I can take much more of this … lying to her.”  He paused to gather his composure.  “So I told her that I wouldn’t be around much; that we shouldn’t see each other for a while.”

“You did what?”  Joe was shocked.  “You don’t mean that.”

Dejected and in pain, he walked over to the porch bench and sat down.  He wiped away his tears with the back of his hand.  “I just …. I just love her so much and seeing her all the time knowing she doesn’t feel the same way … it hurts.”

Joe didn’t know what to say.  He sat down beside him. “Look, Barry, I know you love her, but staying away from her, it’s not going to work.”  He paused as he thought about it.  “I have to wonder why you lied to her like that and I think I know the reason,” he said.

He sniffed.  “What; what are you thinking?”

“That you’re trying to push her away for good.”  At his surprised expression, he continued, “I’m not saying it was a conscious decision, but deep down, you want her to look at you differently.”

He sighed and thought about his words.  “You may be right.  When we talked at Jitters, she never looked at me like that before; not once.”

Joe nodded, finally understanding him.  “I see.”  He wanted to help them.  “Things are desperate, Barry, so I think the only solution to keep her safe is for you to continue to see her … as the Streak.”

Barry was truly stunned.  “You want me to continue to lie to her?”

“It’s only temporary.”

“You say that now, but for how long?”  He actually began to consider the idea.  Yes, he would be lying, but a part of him, a vast part of him loved talking to her as the Streak.  Their earlier conversation did things to him.  When they had talked, there wasn’t this barrier between them; this strange grew-up-together vibe that had kept them at arms-length for years.  He needed to talk to her, touch her in such a way that set his heart to pounding with emotion.

Joe sensed he liked the idea.  “Think about it Ok?  I’m going in now to check up on her.  I can’t imagine she’s taking your ‘breakup’ very well.”

Barry gave him a sad smile. “No, I don’t imagine that she is.  Goodnight, Joe, and thank you.”

“Sure, goodnight, Barry.”

~o~o~

 _Meanwhile, in another part of town_ :

Another meta-human was at that very moment reading Iris’s blog, getting more and more excited about finally meeting and destroying the Streak.  Once he was gone, everyone would be talking about him; making blogs about him.  This ‘Iris West’ seemed pretty informed about the Streak, but he wondered how she was able to interview him.  According to her most recent entries posted only a few hours ago, she had, in fact, spoken to him.

 _So, he is a man_ , he thought.  _And a man has weaknesses and this man’s weakness is … Iris West_.

TBC!

~o~o~

Song Inspiration:  _All I Ever Wanted_ , Mariah Carey.

A/N:  Well, that was gut-wrenching to write.  I have to admit that the idea that Barry may have unintentionally pushed her toward the Streak with that lie, made sense to me, but there is another man in this equation.  I’ve decided to continue this story at least through the winter finale meaning mid-December.  I wouldn’t think Iris would find out the truth before then, but you never know.  We’ll see what happens going forward.  My Muse is definitely inspired.  Now tell me your thoughts.  Reviews/kudos is love.


	6. All I Need is You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this next chapter, Barry realizes he wouldn't be able to keep his vow to stay away from Iris. A familiar nemesis shows up from their past intent on destroying the Streak. Caught up in his feelings after the rescue, Barry remembers THE moment his feelings changed, and later they are finally on the same page. The 'Westallen' goodness was front and center in this episode and I couldn't be happier about it. It definitely made up for their 'break-up' last week. There are spoilers for Ep. 1.06. Read on! :D

_Chapter_ _6: All I Need is You_

_Jitters, present time late one evening:_

It was almost closing time and Iris was posting a few thoughts about the Streak. He was always on her mind so she decided to write it all down. Of course, even though he hadn't spoken much, their talk on the rooftop was uppermost in her mind:

_To understand what I'm about to tell you, you need to do something first. You need to believe in the impossible. Can you do that? Good; because all of us, we have forgotten what miracles look like; maybe because they haven't made much of an appearance lately. Our lives have become ordinary. But there is someone out there who is truly_ _extraordinary_ _. I don't know where you came from; I don't know your name. But I have seen you do the impossible to protect the city I love. So for those of us who believe in you and what you're doing, I just want to say thank you._

She closed her laptop, hoping beyond hope that she would see him again; not only in action, but to ask questions, to find answers about Barry's parents and what happened that night. She couldn't give up on finding out the truth. Barry may have given up, but she hadn't done it. She didn't know the meaning of the word.

Suddenly, the familiar wind blew her hair and a flash of lightning appeared and there he stood. The next thing she knew, they were on the roof.

"You're welcome," Barry said in his echo voice. He tried not to smile. It really was good to see her again; he had missed her.

Smiling she asked, "How did you; I literally just hit send?"

"Speed reading," he replied.

"It's crazy what you can do with your voice," she said and wondered when she would ever hear his real voice. She would give anything to hear it; maybe one day he would trust her enough to let her in.

He streaked again. "You need to stop writing your blog," he told her firmly. This wasn't a joke; things were dangerous.

Slightly out of breath, she said, "People need to know that you exist." Her phone rang. It was Eddie; she pressed ignore. "What else can you do?"

He streaked again. "This is not an interview."

"Come on; you got to give me something … hobbies, pet peeves, what's your favorite color? Wait, scratch that last one … red, duh, obviously." She stared at him hoping to pull her thoughts together and ask the important questions.

"You're not hearing me." Barry was getting frustrated.

"My hearing is fine; it's just selective. What should I call you?" She mentally kicked herself. _Yeah, that's_ _crucial_ , she thought.

He streaked up behind her. "Anything … but the Streak."

"Fine, suggestions?" A new name would be cool.

Barry tried to get her to focus. "You said you were writing about me to bring hope to someone you cared about. How would he feel if doing that put you in harm's way?"

"He and I aren't exactly on the same page these days," she sadly replied. "Besides you bring hope to a lot of people, so I'm doing this for them." She didn't really believe that; Barry was uppermost in her mind, maybe even more so than the Streak.

Barry wondered what she was thinking. A police siren sounded in the distance. Iris heard it too.

"To be continued; gotta go!" He streaked away.

"Wait, you can't leave me up …" He streaked back. "Here." Seconds later she was back in the coffee bar. "Whoa!"

~o~o~

_Later that night, downtown Central City:_

Still in his costume, Barry followed the sirens to a police chase. A yellow Humvee was speeding and police cars were following him. He recognized Joe and Eddie in one of the cars, but they were at a roadblock hoping he would stop. No luck.

A young boy crossing the street, with earbobs in his ears, is saved by the Streak before he could be run over by the speeding car.

Bullets were repeatedly fired, but he wasn't stopping. Joe and Eddie ran forward ahead of the police barricade and fired even more gunshots, but he continued on. His face morphed into metal; both men saw it.

"What the hell?" Eddie muttered transfixed by what he had seen.

"Eddie!?" Joe hollered and tackled him just before the Humvee barreled through the blockade of police cars.

Barry followed him then confronted him in an alleyway. After speaking to the metal man, Barry is beaten and thrown over the Humvee as if he were a rag doll.

On the ground writhing in pain from a broken wrist and who knew what other injuries, the man approached him saying with utter disdain in his voice, "You were born to take a beating."

Barry managed to escape with his life.

~o~o~

_Back at STAR Labs a little while later:_

Barry had barely escaped his fight with a meta-human. He had every intention of killing him. When his fist made contact with his jaw, it broke as if it was made of glass. The pain was unbearable. His wrist was broken in two.

He had never been so glad to have made it back. Once inside the Lab, his strength was waning, his vision blurred and he was going to pass out. Then he heard the voices of his friends.

"Barry, are you Ok?" That was Caitlin. She rolled him over then she gasped.

Hours or minutes later, he awakened and found himself being examined by Caitlin. His wrist was in a healing device.

She spoke of his injuries: "thirteen fractures; that's a new record, and that's just in your hand. You also have a concussion, three cracked ribs, and a bruised spleen. Even with your powers, you'll need a few hours to heal."

"What exactly did you hit?" Dr. Wells asked.

"A man, a big bad man," Barry replied. "His skin changed when I hit him; it turned into metal."

"Interesting; a man of steel," Dr. Wells thoughtfully commented.

"So you went after a meta-human alone? Dude, why didn't you call us?" Cisco asked.

"I didn't know what he was," Barry replied and tried to sit up. His entire body felt like it may split in two; that's how bad the pain was. "Besides, I was off duty."

"Humph," Caitlin mumbled. Barry glanced at her.

"You're lucky he didn't knock out your teeth. Those puppies don't grow back," Cisco commented only half-joking.

"The strange thing is; I feel like I knew him."

"What do you mean?" Caitlin asked.

"He said something that was familiar," Barry replied. "But he's going to hurt someone if I don't stop him, so how do I fight a guy made of steel?"

"We will find a way; tonight you heal," Dr. Wells replied.

"Yeah," he said and lay back down, exhausted and apprehensive.

~o~o~

_Central City Police Station, the next morning:_

Iris had calmed down a bit from the other night. She was still upset about Barry wanting to stay away from her. The tears had dried up, but the anger and pain were still there, and she didn't know how to deal with it. These feelings were all new to her. She prided herself for her self-control, her level-head, and her need to keep the peace. But now all of that was out the window. Barry had lied to her face. She was furious with him.

She walked into the station to see Eddie and hoped that Barry wasn't around. No luck.

"Barry," she greeted him stiffly. "Hey, Babe, I heard the news. Are you OK?" She asked Eddie.

"I'm fine, but you would have known that if you picked up your phone. I called you three times last night. Where were you?" Eddie asked.

"Sorry, I had to work late," she lied. "So I heard the Streak saved a kid, any comment, Detective?"

Barry's eyebrow rose, then he hid a grin.

"All I know is that our perp got away. Barry here is going to help me find him."

"Fine, I have other sources," she said.

"I'll see you tonight," Eddie said. She kissed him then he watched her leave.

Iris and Barry did not make eye contact, both avoiding it.

"What is going on between you two?" Eddie asked.

"What do you mean? It's nothing; its fine; I don't know," Barry stammered. He backed out the office, bumping into the door jab, but he managed to leave without falling over his own two feet.

Eddie shook his head and wondered about those two.

A little later that morning during an update about the guy in the Humvee, they got a hit on a few ATM thefts and Tony 'Adam' Woodward was the guy that had attacked Barry. Then he remembered him:

Flashing back to their days in school, Tony had physically and verbally abused Barry by threatening him with violence, mentioning his Father being in prison for killing his Mother. Barry was furious when he went there, but he was at least a foot shorter than Tony. Iris was there as well, but this one time he said the same thing he had said to him the other night. "You were born to take a beating."

~o~o~

_Still at the station:_

Barry then filled Joe in on the metal man. His name was Anthony Adam Woodworth, a meta-human and bully from his school days. Iris knows him too.

"I can't believe this. Iris will be in danger if he targets her."

"It's the Streak he wants to hurt and he knows about her blog; I'm sure of it."

Joe shook his head. "We have to find this guy before he turns his hate to Iris."

"We'll catch him, Joe," Barry said.

~o~o~

_Downtown, working a lead:_

Eddie and Barry were following a lead on a metal worker and Eddie asked him about Iris and why were chilly to each other.

"We had a fight and I don't feel comfortable talking about it with you," Barry replied.

"I understand, but friendships are hard to find let alone keep for so many years. You should cherish it."

"Detective?" One of his colleagues pulled Eddie away.

Barry had a lot of good memories of his early days with his new family. This was one of them.

~o~o~

_Over ten years ago, in the backyard of your home:_

Barry and Joe were boxing, but Barry wasn't catching on very well. "Dodge and weave, dodge and weave."

"This is hard," Barry complained.

"Come here, sweetie," Joe called to his daughter.

"You want me to hit a girl?" Barry asked, shocked.

"He wants you to try," Iris replied and grinned.

Moments later, Barry was on the ground and Iris was helping him up. "Sorry, Barry," she said and smiled at him.

"It's Ok, Barry." Joe pulled him into a hug from behind. "Remember, if you come up against someone you know you can't beat, be smart, it's Ok to run the other way."

~o~o~

_Back to the present:_

After checking in at the station, Barry found out that Iris had been confronted at the bar by Tony or whatever his name was. He was furious; he must have found her through her blog.

Later that evening, and after getting his ass kicked again by 'the metal man,' he streaked over to the coffee bar and he found her all alone.

"I guess you got my message?" She asked happy to see him.

"Are you Ok?" He asked, extremely concerned.

"I'm a cop's daughter. I can handle myself," she replied.

"Not with this guy," he said thinking how he was unable to stop him … twice.

"I knew him when we were kids. He didn't want to hurt me; he wanted to impress me," she said. "But he's fixated on you and not in a good way."

"Did you know where he went?"

"He said he had a place out in West Keystone, bragged about how big it was, but I have no idea where."

"I do." He turned to go.

"Wait, there's something else. His hand; it transformed like an iron fist." Then it dawned on her. "He's like you; isn't he?"

"Yes and writing about me is what brought him to you."

"I know, but maybe I could talk …" He interrupted her.

"He's very dangerous." There was a knock at the door.

She turned at the sound. "Damn, that's my ride; I have to go."

Barry streaked away.

~o~o~

_Later that same evening:_

Iris was at home when she heard noises coming from outside. Looking out the window, she gasped as the police cruiser was upside down, the patrolmen nowhere to be seen. Turning at the front door opening, Tony was there and the next thing she knew she was back at school. She couldn't believe it.

"Remember this place, Iris?" Tony asked. He roughly pulled her inside.

"So what's the plan here Tony; finally going to go for that GED?" She asked sarcastically.

"You want a plan; how this? You used to write about the Streak, right? Now you can write about me?"

"You just abducted me? Why would I do that?"

"Because the Streak … is dead."

"No!" _It can't be true_ , she thought. _He can't be dead._ Tears blurred her vision.

"Squashed like a little bug by me. So if you don't want the same thing to happen to you, you're going to tell the whole world that there's a new big man on campus! I'm just getting started."

"You could have anyone to write about you, Tony. Why me?"

He leaned against the wall and looked her up and down. "Because I like you Iris; always have."

She changed her tune then sashayed over to him. "You should have said something." Coming closer, she pulled the lever on the fire alarm.

Tony was furious. He caught her easily and dragged her back inside. "Do something like that again and I'll give you something more than a bruise." He was far too strong. Her self-defense classes would do no good against someone like him.

"Tony; turn yourself in before things get worse; it's not too late," Iris was begging, but of course it would do no good.

"Yes, it is. The cops are already looking for me; so be ready to cover the show of a lifetime because I'm not going down without a fight."

Barry shows up seconds later. "Good; because you just found one!"

Iris nearly cried with relief. He was alive.

"You just won't stay dead," Tony said shocked to see him still alive. "Come to save your little fan girl?"

"This is between you and me, just let her go!" Barry said.

"Oh, I could but I'd rather make her watch while I break every bone in your body."

He streaked between his legs then kicked him from behind. "I know guys like you who peaked in high school, never got over it. All these powers and look at you, bully then, bully now."

Barry was losing the fight. The flag pole was not a good idea. On the ground beaten, Joe's words to retreat came into his mind. _If you do come up against somebody you know you can't beat, be smart, it's Ok to_ _run the other way_.

He streaked away. "There goes your hero," Tony said smirking.

Iris was so worried. _Please come back._

"He made it out," Cisco said.

"Why did he stop?" Caitlin asked.

"He's miles away; five point three miles away."

"Barry, wait!" Caitlin hollered.

"He's going to do it!" Cisco hollered. "Run, man, run!"

Barry ran as fast as he ever had, streaking past cars, blowing out windows in cars and businesses. He crashed through the double doors and the struck Tony on the jaw as hard as he could. The metal in his face disappeared and landed a few feet away. Iris jumped out of the way to avoid a fall.

"SUPER SONIC PUNCH, BABY, WHOOOHOOO!" Cisco was ecstatic.

Barry lay there utterly and completely spent; he couldn't move. He may have broken his hand again. Tony slowly stood up ready to go at it again then a driving punch landed on his jaw and fell to the floor unconscious.

Barry couldn't believe it, but then his voice was full of pride. "Nice cross."

"I think I broke my hand," Iris whimpered ready to scream from the pain.

Still catching his breath, Barry whispered, "Ugh, me too."

~o~o~

_Just before entering the coffee bar, the following evening:_

Barry was having a flashback. Why it would come to him now at this particular time, he wasn't sure. But after he and Iris had survived, the comradery they felt, working together to bring down Tony, he had never felt closer to her. But no, there was another time.

_Five years ago, the West house:_

After dispatching James from her life, at least he hoped he had, moments passed and they were still holding each other close. Then she finally pulled herself together. She wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand.

"I'm alright; thanks, Barry." She went and sat down on the sofa. Pulling a pillow close to her chest, she took a deep breath trying to regain some control.

"No, you're not alright," he said sat down next to her. She turned to him. The look on her face was troubling. "What is it?"

"I have to talk to someone about this or I'm going to explode. Talking to my Father is out of the question; at least not about this."

He wondered what it could be. "Iris, you can talk to me about anything; you know that," Barry said hoping to reassure her.

She turned from him. "I don't know if I can."

"Of course you can. Just spit it out."

Taking a deep breath, she forged ahead. "Barry, I'm nearly twenty years old and I've never …" She hesitated, reluctant to talk about her fears.

He frowned, not understanding. "Never what?"

She raised her eyebrows. "Do I have to say it?"

It dawned on him. "Oh, I see." He was very uncomfortable talking about sex with her.

Then, she didn't know why but she had to know. "Have you ever …?"

"No," he quickly replied, shaking his head.

She hid a grin. "I guess with James, I thought..." she hesitated.

"No, Iris. He wasn't the right guy for you and you know it."

"But how will I know? I don't want to end up a virgin at thirty or forty … or."

He chuckled. "You won't." He didn't know how he knew that to be true; he just knew.

"Barry, I don't care how many science fiction novels you've read, you cannot predict the future."

"No, but any guy would be lucky to have you." He stared at her lovely face. "You're beautiful, smart, funny, sweet, and …" he whispered, heart beating triple time.

She needed to hear more. "And what?" He was staring at her so strangely.

He shrugged hoping to make light of their serious conversation. "Just believe me OK? It will happen and when he comes into your life, you'll know."

Iris wasn't so sure about that. She turned from him. "Right, well, I hope I'm not looking the other way or I may miss him."

Barry stood up, still feeling uncomfortable. He didn't understand what was happening to him. He walked over to the fireplace; placed his hands on the mantel hoping to calm his racing heart. Photographs of them together were everywhere. He knew what it was; he knew exactly what it was. He took a shuttering breath.

She touched his shoulder. "Barry, what is it? Are you Ok?"

He nearly jumped out of his skin. He backed away from her and bumped into a chair. "I need to unpack. When will Joe be home?"

She frowned. "In a few hours I think," she replied.

"Ok, well, I'll talk to you later."

"Alright," she said. He picked up his bags. "Barry, wait. I wanted to thank you for listening and talking to me and I'll take your advice, Ok?"

"Great, you do that." He turned to go.

"And Barry?" He turned to her. "Yeah?"

"Welcome home." She smiled at him.

He smiled in return. "Thanks; it's good to be home." He headed to his room. Once inside he set the bags down and walked over to the window. Running his fingers through his hair, he chastised his heart, "How did you let this happen? Are you insane? Have you lost your mind completely?" His heart refused to listen to his brain. And then another thought crashed into his mind stunning him at how utterly ridiculous it was, "I want to be her first and I want her to be mine too."

Shaking his head at fate and how unpredictable it was, he turned from the window, walked over to the dresser and picked up another photograph. Taken when they were a lot younger; it was before they started school that first year after his Mom had died. Oh, the memories refused to leave him alone. "Who am I kidding? It's always been there like some crouching tiger ready to pounce, just waiting and waiting, and now it couldn't be held back." He fell on the bed and let out a loud groan.

A knock came at the door. "Barry, are you Ok? Are you ill?" It was Iris.

"I'm fine, Iris, just fine!" He replied and closed his eyes.

"Ok, dinner will be ready in an hour." No response. "Barry?"

"I'll be there!"

"Ok," she said and left him alone.

He opened his eyes and accepted it with his whole heart. Iris was the center of all of it; the center of everything he wanted and needed in his life.

~o~o~

_Back to the present, at Jitters:_

Pulling his mind back from that eye-opening conversation, he entered the coffee bar and she was alone again, but she was safe. She was cleaning up when the door bells jingled. She turned at the sound.

"Hi, oh I thought you were someone else," Iris said and watched him come closer.

"Joe told me what happened. How's the hand?" Barry asked concerned.

"Not broken; so that's something," Iris replied. She wanted to apologize and he did too. She could see it clearly.

A few moments of awkward silence, then, "I'm sorry I said…" She began.

"I should say," Barry began. They spoke at the same time.

A moment, then, "I've missed you," she told him honestly.

"Yeah, I've missed you too." He paused. "When I heard Tony took you, I … I just don't know what I would do if anything happened to you."

Iris was touched, but he didn't have to worry about her. "Well, my Guardian Angel is looking out for me." Things were awkward for a moment. "Do you want to hang out; catchup?"

"Yeah, I would like that." Just to be near her was enough for now.

"I promise not to talk about the Streak tonight."

"No, I want you to, I mean you can; I want you to talk about whatever you want to talk about. I know it's important to you." The comradery was back and he loved it. They sat down.

"Good, because it's not only just the Streak; there are others out there that are like him. I've gotten scattered posts about this guy that's on fire, except he doesn't burn up." Iris was very excited about writing about other meta-humans.

"Wait a second; you're looking for the burning man now too?" _Oh, boy_ , he thought.

"Yeah, why not; a lot can happen in a week, especially with the Streak?" Barry chuckled at her enthusiasm; it was infectious. "I've been trying to get answers from him; where does he come from; how he does what he does; but he dodges everything literally with his super-speed power. When he moves, Barry, you don't even see him. He comes and goes in a blink of an eye, in a …" She hesitated.

"Flash?" Barry finished for her. His smile was indulgent and acceptable.

It seemed as if she had waited forever for that smile.

"In a flash … yeah," she whispered smiling.

~o~o~

_Back home writing her blog:_

_Today, I was saved by the impossible, a mystery man … the fastest man alive. Then a friend gave me an idea for a new name. And something tells me it's going to catch on:_

_THE FLASH!_

TBC!

~o~o~

Song Inspiration: _Never Felt This Way_ , Alicia Keys.

A/N: This chapter may have seemed like it was all over the place. But I felt these scenes were important to set up their connection and both their sweet apologies. Barry's memories of THE moment seemed to fit into what had come before. The words just flowed. I hope you enjoyed that scene as much as I enjoyed writing it. Now tell me your thoughts. Reviews/kudos is love.


	7. Everything I Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this next chapter, we're going to jump into the fray. After Ep. 1.07, and the rumors I've read about Barry telling Iris 'something important,' I thought why the hell not!? So, there are no spoilers in this part, just me speculating about Iris and those back-to-back episodes of her being in mortal peril. Yes, she did save herself in a lot of ways, but Barry must be feeling a lot of guilt and maybe something more. I admit I had a bit of fun with them. As I said, there are no spoilers. Read on! :D

_Chapter_ _7: Everything I do_

_Jitters, several days later:_

Iris was about to leave for the evening when the Flash whisked her up to the roof. She was a bit stunned; he hadn't spoken to her at all. He stood some distance away, as usual. Then she sensed something.

"What is it?" She asked a bit afraid he was going to stop meeting with her like this. She so enjoyed these meetings, although he didn't usually give her anything to write. She thought he just wanted to talk or just to see her. She actually liked that idea. He stood there staring at her but she dreaded the thought of them not meeting again. And without even realizing it, she came closer feeling as if he needed to talk. He was still. "Is this about the other day?"

"Yes, it is," Barry replied. The guilt was eating him up. After seeing her alive and well and with her Father, a part of him realized something. He had to tell her how he felt, not as Barry of course, but as the Flash. He knew it was wrong, but he had to tell her or show her somehow that she was more to him than just a fan girl.

"Is this about what you said about me, being worthy of being on time?" He nodded. "Did you want to explain?"

"You know what I meant," he replied as he stared at her.

"No, I don't. I mean, I think I did, but," she paused and came closer, "You can tell me." He backed up. She stopped and reached out to him. "Don't run off, please."

"Iris, I …" He wanted to tell her so badly, but there was something else he wanted more.

When he spoke her name like that, it did something to her. "You what?"

She was so close now that he could reach out and touch her and so he did. He waited for her to turn and run away, but she didn't. Feeling encouraged, he whispered, "Don't be afraid."

"I'm not afraid," she told him firmly and he believed her. Her heart was beating so fast.

Barry's heart was just as fast. "Close your eyes and don't open them until I tell you," he inwardly grinned as the stubbornness furrowed her brow.

"Alright," she said and closed her eyes. "Are you going to?" Before she could finish, he kissed her square on the lips. His face wasn't blurring; she knew it. The kiss was soft, slow, and tentative as if he were waiting for her to respond. Her lips softened and he kissed her a bit more deeply. Barry felt encouraged and deepened the kiss. He was thrilled about actually kissing her. His imagination paled in comparison.

He backed away after a moment. "You can open your eyes now."

Before she opened them, Iris touched her lips and grinned. "It's you, isn't it?"

Barry frowned. "Yes, I'm the Flash."

"Yes, you are, but you're also my best friend … Barry Allen."

He didn't know what to say then he spoke in his own voice. "I thought you would have forgotten about that."

"How could I forget my first kiss and yours too, if I recall?"

Then they both remembered.

~o~o~

_Ten years ago, the West house:_

In the recreation room in the basement, they were boxing again. They usually did this almost every weekend. They both needed the exercise and Barry loved boxing with her. She was good at it, but he was getting better. Of course, he still had this thing about hitting a girl. But Iris was just so much better at it than him, but with Joe's help and encouragement, he managed to pick up his game.

After several hours, Iris was getting tired, but Barry wanted to continue. He was pumped, hopping up and down, up and down. "Come on Iris, just a few more minutes."

She sighed. "Alright, you asked for it." Then she got a burst of energy and dived into him with a right hook that missed its mark then she lost her footing and fell into him. He caught her easily. They landed on the boxing mat all arms and legs, both laughing and enjoying themselves.

The laughing stopped then things became awkward and tense. She was on top of him, her eyes sparkled and she was smiling at him. Her hair was all over her head. Iris had recently begun to straighten her hair and he liked it but he did miss the curls. He reached to smooth it away, which was weird with the gloves on, and then he leaned up a little. Iris didn't know what to do. Then she instinctively closed her eyes and leaned down.

Their lips touched briefly and then a bit more pressure from Barry then more still.

"Barry, Iris; are you down there!?" It was Joe.

Iris jumped up; Barry also jumped up as well. They stood there staring for a moment then they both looked down at the floor.

"We're here, Dad!" Iris then rushed up the stairs and she didn't look back.

Barry followed her after a few minutes. They never spoke of it again. And no more boxing!

~o~o~

_Back to the present:_

Regretting what he had done back then and this evening as well, Barry paced back and forth, back and forth.

Iris crossed her arms upset and disappointed he would do this to her. "What did you expect would happen, Barry, that I wouldn't know it was you?" He didn't reply. "I've kissed exactly three people in my life: you, James, and Eddie. How many people have you kissed?"

He turned to her with a shocked expression then he didn't know what to say. "Well, I, Ummm," he stammered.

"Well?" She was teasing, but she really needed to know.

"Only three: you, Heather, and … Felicity," he finally admitted and winced at her look.

"Felicity; you kissed Felicity? When was this?" Iris was shocked. "One date and a double date at that, and you kissed her." It was a statement. He was silent; not looking at her. "Humph, well, this is interesting." Was that jealousy she was feeling? She was actually jealous.

Barry was tongue-tied. He cleared this throat. "Iris, look, we're getting off topic, here. The only reason I kissed you was to tell you how I feel. That was it."

"I see; well, I don't see why you couldn't have done it as Barry. Doesn't he feel the same way as you do?" Holding in a laugh, she waited for an answer. "Well?"

Barry glanced at her face and she was teasing him. He could see it clearly. Then he came closer.

She held up her arms. "Barry, now, we need to talk about this." She backed away from him.

"We've talked enough." He grabbed her and then kissed her deeply.

She kissed him back, her arms around his shoulders pulling him closer. After a few minutes of tender kisses and caresses, he pulled away and Iris slowly opened her eyes. "Now, tell me the truth. What would you have done if Barry had kissed you like that?" She was silent, still dazed by his kisses. "Come on, Iris, you've never looked at me like that, not ever and certainly not the way you look at the Flash."

Then it dawned on her. "Are you jealous of yourself? I can't believe this."

Actually, now that she said the words, it was true. The Flash was having all the fun with her while he hovered in the corner waiting for her to look at him differently. He bowed his head.

At his silence, her voice softened but only a little. "Barry, look at me. Go ahead; I'm listening."

"Iris, I wanted you to know so badly but I was afraid that everything would change between us, and," he hesitated.

Iris decided to take the reins of their relationship. It took a lot of courage for him to risk their friendship and kiss her again, but she was proud of him; very proud. "Barry, when I look at you, I don't see the superhero, the man who can run faster than humanly possible and do all those impossible things." She paused as she watched his eyes light up. "I see a boy standing before me telling me about his Mother and how she had died. I see a young man lying in a coma unable to open his eyes, and when I look at you now, so tall and strong and … you love me, Iris West. I know you love me, Barry. It's in everything you do. I guess I've always known it." She touched his cheek. "That's the man I fell in love with." Holding the tears at bay, she watched him closely. "You do believe me don't you?"

She simply had no idea how much he loved her and that he would die for her. He surely would, and with that thought, he clutched her to him tightly. Holding her like this gave him hope, strength and resolve.

When he pulled away, she guided him to a bench. They sat down; she took his hand. "I want to tell you something."

"Alright," Barry whispered, holding tightly to her hand.

"The night before you came to me and told me that you had given up the search for your Mom's killer and that you didn't want to see me anymore," she hesitated as the pain of that moment upset her.

"I'm sorry about that."

"I know you are, but I had a dream about the Flash and you were there as well."

He was totally surprised. "Really?"

"Yeah, it was strange. In my dream, the Flash was holding me and we were literally flying together. It felt like flying and soon it was over and you and I were standing in the living room at the house and … I reached out to touch your chest, but when I looked up to see your face, it was you Barry, not the Flash; you were standing before me. Then I woke up." Barry smiled; she shook her head.

"Then you must have had some idea about me and the Flash; I mean maybe it was premonition or something?" Barry asked.

"I actually suspected it several weeks ago, but I pushed it from my mind." She paused as she thought about it. "I wanted it to be true, but then I didn't want it to be true."

Barry was confused. "What do you mean?"

"If you were the Flash, it meant that you were lying to me every day. I didn't want to believe it." Her eyes watered.

He pulled her to him tightly. "I'm so sorry, Iris. I hated lying to you. I hated it so much."

She pulled away. "Why did you lie to me? I know you trust me, Barry, so tell me the truth."

He bowed his head for a moment, feeling ashamed. "Joe convinced me not to tell you," he replied. At her shocked expression, he continued. "Iris, please don't blame your Father. I went along with it because losing you wasn't an option and keeping you as far as away from the Flash as possible seemed like the best solution."

She shook her head at her family lying to her, but she couldn't hold it against them. "I suppose it would have worked if you didn't whisk me off to the roof every other day," she said and grinned, teasing him.

He pulled her close under his chin. "It was so hard to stay away from you. Your blog became an excuse for me to see you. I wanted you to stop writing about me, but then I didn't want you to stop."

She smiled loving that idea. "Do you remember the one thing I said to you while you were in a coma? I told you every day."

He wracked his brain then he remembered. "Yeah, I remember."

"Good, because I haven't forgotten." She stroked his lightning emblem on his chest.

"You said that when I woke up, that you would never let me out of your sight again." He smiled.

She pulled away. "I meant it, Barry, and I still do," she smiled at him.

"I'm sorry I kept this from you. I was confused about a lot of things, but not about this; never about this." He leaned down, closed his eyes, and she closed hers, as well, then they kissed, tentatively and sweetly and then he pulled her to him tightly. She kissed him back in spite of her confusion about how she would fit into his life now; just so many questions to be answered.

Barry pulled back after a minute. Smiling at the look on her face, he whispered, "Now, that was wonderful. I love kissing you." He leaned down for another kiss.

She pushed him away a little. "Does my Father know about your feelings for me?"

"Yeah, he knows."

She bowed her head. "I just wish you would have told me."

"I'm sorry, Iris," he said it again.

"I know you are."

Barry had to know. "Do you forgive me?"

She held him close. "We'll work this out," she answered him honestly.

He understood so he decided not to push the issue. "I love you, Iris," Barry whispered, finally able to say it.

She touched his cheek. Her eyes roamed over his costumed face. "I love you, too."

~o~o~

_Barry's apartment, moments later:_

Barry eyes popped open. He awakened from the most vivid and powerful dream he had ever had in his life. But it wasn't the first time he had dreamed of telling Iris the truth. Each time was different. The first dream, he hadn't kissed her, and he wasn't in his costume. She hated him and refused to even speak to him. This latest one was perfect. She forgave him and kissed him over and over.

He really needed to talk to Dr. Wells about these dreams. They weren't the future at least he didn't think so. Maybe it had something to do with this latest encounter with Blackout, or maybe his coma was the cause. He'd read about comas and how they could affect areas of the brain that may manifest themselves into dreams or even nightmares. All of his senses seemed heightened. He was losing sleep over these intense and penetrating visions or dreams or whatever they were.

His inner voice was relentless. _You know what you have to do. You have to tell her the truth, then the visions would go away, or maybe they won't._ He was really starting to worry about the state of his mind.

~o~o~

_That same morning at STAR Labs:_

The team was thoughtful after Barry told them about his dreams or visions of the future or maybe they weren't. Harrison wasn't sure what they were, but Barry was right. They needed to check him out more closely. He wasn't truly surprised about Barry dreaming of Iris. He did attend their wedding after all.

Caitlin and Cisco were also thoughtful about Barry's dreams of the future.

At their looks, he told them the truth. "I'm sure it's not a secret; I'm in love with Iris."

"Dude, we know that." It was a statement then Cisco glanced at Caitlin and raised an eyebrow and waited.

"Of course, we know," she finally replied.

"It's not like I have any choice; I can't control these visions." He glanced at Dr. Wells. "Can I?" He asked.

"No, I don't think so," he thoughtfully replied.

"But you're not sure? Please you have to help me. I'm not getting any sleep. My body needs to rest."

"We can help you with that." Caitlin wasn't surprised at his look. "It's just a mild sedative. It will work."

"It's just temporary," Dr. Wells said.

"I don't like taking drugs of any kind, and now that I'm … The way that I am, I'm even more skeptical. But I do need to rest." He rubbed his tired eyes and thought about the last dream.

"You really want to tell her, don't you?" That was Caitlin.

He sighed heavily. "It's always on my mind; I can't think of anything else," he sadly replied.

Caitlin sighed and went to get the pills. She handed them to him. "Take two of these and it will help you sleep."

"Thanks, Caitlin," he said and tried to smile. He then had a thought. "Liquor doesn't affect me. Is there alcohol in these pills?"

"No, there is no alcohol," she replied.

"Alright, Barry, follow me. We'll do a brain scan and draw some blood," Dr. Wells said.

About an hour later, "I'm going home to get some rest for a few hours. Call me if anything comes up," Barry said. He held up the pills. "Thanks for these."

~o~o~

_At his apartment, a few hours later:_

Barry was in the midst of the most incredible dream of his life. It was his wedding day.

Iris stood before him looking so beautiful even more so than his ever-increasing dreams about her. Barry knew it was a vision, but he accepted it and enjoyed it. She was smiling at him, her expression of love and commitment; just so lovely; his eyes watered. Tears of joy fell from his eyes both in the dream and in the real world. He couldn't believe it.

When he awakened a few hours later, it was so real, he knew the truth now. His dreams weren't dreams at all. They may not be of the future, but it was what he wished and hoped for, and the only way to fulfill it was to tell the truth. It was the only way to make them a reality; he sincerely believed that.

Then he got a call from Dr. Wells; they had the results of his tests. "Tell me."

"Come to the Lab, Barry; we need to talk."

He was there in seconds. "Well, what is it? What did you find?" He asked as he walked into the Lab.

"Your brain scans are back to normal, and your blood work is different from before, but that's only because of Blackout."

"Then, what does that mean? So, were my visions caused by the coma or not?"

"I have to say yes they were, but now that your body is adjusting to your confrontation with Blackout, you should be Ok," Dr. Wells replied.

Barry read between the lines. "It's me; isn't it? It's because of me," he stated.

"Well, I think it is. Your anxieties and concerns about Iris are causing these visions Barry," Dr. Wells said.

"I have to tell her," Barry said entirely resigned to the idea. "And let the pieces fall where they may."

Caitlin felt sorry for him. "Maybe you could bring her here and explain. It may soften the blow."

Barry wasn't so sure about that. "Well, I don't know."

"We can explain it to her. If she knew exactly what happened that night, then maybe she'll see your point of view … and forgive you," Dr. Wells said.

He actually chuckled. "I know Iris; she'll be upset and her trust in me could change. Everything will be different between us."

"That could be true, but she'll forgive you … in time," Caitlin said, hoping to make him feel better.

His visions had given him some much-needed courage. "I hope so."

TBC!

~o~o~

Song Inspiration: _One and Only_ , Adele.

A/N: I'm a terrible tease with Barry's visions. But that was so much fun! Their talk about their 'kissing' history had me dying of laughter. According to rumors, 'something important' isn't going to happen until the mid-season finale on December 9 (after the crossover episodes), so let the speculation begin. Now, tell me your thoughts. Reviews/kudos is love.


	8. All We Need to Say

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this next chapter, its my gut reaction to this week's insane crossover episode. Talk about angst, Iris and Barry have defined the word with their breakups. I find this ironic and really strange. The writers have viewers completely off-balance. But my Muse was very intrigued, to say the least; I have no idea what is going to happen next. When you read this, keep in mind the rumors/spoilers for next week's mid-season finale.

**There are mild and major spoilers for Ep. 1.08 and 1.09 (unaired), respectively. Read on! :D**

~o~o~

_Chapter 8: All We Need to Say_

_The West house, Iris and Barry_ :

After her break-up with Flash, several days later, Iris called Barry to talk to him. She needed his advice, but he seemed reluctant when she asked him to come over. She was still in shock about all of it, not only about their breakup, but Flash's attack on her boyfriend. It made no sense, but she had to know why.

After making inquiries with her Father, apparently Flash had told her the truth. He wasn't responsible for his actions that night. It was all a mistake, but she still needed answers. Maybe Barry would have some insight.

"Barry; are you there?" She asked, hoping he would listen. They were getting along fine now. She couldn't lose him too.

"Yes, I'm here," he finally replied.

"Can you come over? I'm at home; Dad is working late; it's just me," she sniffed.

"Are you crying?" Barry asked.

She sniffed again. "I'm alright. Are you coming?"

A moment's hesitation, then, "I'm coming."

Moving at regular speed, he arrived at the house in about twenty minutes. On his way there, Barry was having second thoughts. This is so wrong on so many levels, but their friendship was all they had and he couldn't lose that; he couldn't. He still had a key. "Iris?"

She came from the kitchen. They stared at each other for one heart-stopping moment. She needed a hug and so did he. He walked further inside and he couldn't help himself. He held out his arms. Iris smiled so happy to see him. She ran to him and hugged him tight, almost knocking him over. He closed his eyes and pulled her closer.

"Thank you for coming," she whispered very happy he came.

"You don't need to thank me." She pulled away and wiped at her eyes. "What's wrong; what's happened?" He asked concerned.

"Everything is a mess," she replied and went to sit down on the sofa.

"Did you break up with Eddie?" He asked and mentally kicked himself in his runaway mouth.

Iris frowned as she turned to stare at him. "No, we're still together."

He glanced down at his shoes. "I had no right to ask that." He paused then sat down beside her. "It's just after the last time we spoke, his plans for a Task Force to bring in the Flash and question his motives, I thought things were strained between you two."

"Everything was Ok, until I told him that the Flash and I had talked."

"I see; he got upset, didn't he." It was a statement. Barry knew the answer. Everyone didn't want them to talk at all.

"Yes, he got upset. Eddie is jealous of the Flash. I've talked to him for months about him. Now, he can't wait to bring him in like he's some sort of vigilante out to hurt people, which isn't true at all. Then right after that, Flash attacked Eddie."

"I heard about it," Barry said unable to speak more.

"But Barry, it wasn't Flash's fault. He got infected by a meta-human and he didn't know what he was doing, but Eddie doesn't care. He doesn't trust him and to make matters worse, he doesn't want me to write about him anymore." At his shocked expression, she continued, "Before I knew the truth about that night, I told Flash that I didn't want to see him anymore."

It still hurt, but he pretended to be stunned. "Is that what you want?"

"Well, at first I thought it was for the best, that we stop seeing each other, but," she hesitated.

"But what?" Barry asked, hanging on every word.

She stood up and walked over to the window thinking about him. "We had this connection. It felt like nothing else in my life. The things he said to me about being his only girl, and he also asked if I had broken up with Eddie."

Barry ignored that last part. "Wait a minute, so Eddie had a right to be jealous? Are you his girlfriend?"

She turned to him. "No, I'm not his girlfriend, Barry. I'm just someone he can talk to; that's all," she replied a bit wistfully.

He stood up and came over to her. "I think it was more than that. Iris, I can hear it your voice. You miss the Flash, don't you?"

She raised her eyes to his face and to his shock they were brimming with tears. "I do; I do miss him."

Stunned again, Barry didn't know whether to confess or just to hold her. He decided the latter. "Everything will work out; you'll see." They stood that way for several long minutes.

He pulled away then things were awkward for a moment. "Well, I guess I should go."

She reluctantly let him go. "Alright, and thank you Barry."

He smiled. "Anytime; and Iris?"

"Yes; what is it?"

"Just … just follow your heart; you can't go wrong with that."

Her eyes watered. "You always know what to say to me." She paused as she stared at him. "I don't know what I would do if you weren't in my life." She felt compelled, then, "I love you, Barry."

They were the right words, but they weren't. "I love you too." Then he was gone.

~o~o~

 _The rooftop, Iris and Flash_ :

After speaking with Barry, she began to hope that Flash and she could pick up where they left off. Eddie didn't need to know about it, and she didn't feel guilty about it at all.

As it turns out, her blog had caused a stir in journalistic circles. Just the other day, she was contacted by several newspapers. They offered her an internship as a writer of op-ed pieces. It meant that she would be writing about Flash and how she felt about him and things he could do. Her opinions could be written even if the editorial page disagreed with it. Thrilled and excited by her news, but she hadn't told anyone; not Barry; not her Father.

Thinking about Flash, she knew the truth now. Eddie was jealous of him and he was jealous of Eddie. His attack of Eddie made sense now. The meta-human that had caused a mass hysteria and thefts at the bank knew exactly what he was doing. The hidden feelings and emotions burst forth and without knowing it, the infected victims had no choice but to react. The Flash did not have a choice. Attacking Eddie was his way of revealing his feelings for her. He actually cared about her. It was a shock, but in truth, she welcomed those feelings. But Flash was a fantasy; nothing more than that. She kept telling herself that over and over.

She had to see him and explain then she sent him a message, but he was late. Just when she was about to leave and head back downstairs, the wind blew her hair. "Iris?"

She turned to him. "Flash?" So relieved to see him, she whispered, "I was beginning to think that you wouldn't come."

He just stared at her and waited. Then she decided to tell him her news. It may cheer him up. She came closer. "Well, I guess I'll do all the talking." Iris sighed. "I know you're upset after … after what I said about not contacting me, but I have news. I may have a job after I graduate in the spring." He was silent. "I was offered a full-time job, several actually and I'll be writing about you all the time and I may even be paid to do it, eventually. Isn't that great?"

He frowned, not understanding. "Is that why you needed to see me?"

He was upset; she could feel it. "No, no, that wasn't the reason."

"Iris look, you were right. We can't do this anymore," he sadly stated. He wished he could stop loving her. But fate had dealt them this insane 'cat and mouse' game, but it couldn't go on unless things changed. Then he thought, why not; why the hell not.

She came closer. He didn't move. "I know why you attacked Eddie." At his silence, she continued, "I understand now what you meant about me being the only girl."

He had to make her understand. "It's true, you are the only one I wanted to talk to; the only one I needed to talk to."

Iris was totally surprised to hear him speak this way. Confused, she shook her head. "I don't know what's happening here, I mean."

Inwardly sighing, he whispered, "Iris, look; just don't contact me again. If you see me at a rescue or anywhere; don't even look at me; just don't. This is wrong; it can't continue."

"No, you don't mean that; it's not wrong, and you know it."

He turned from her and streaked a few feet away, but he wanted to run far away from her, but running would not make these feelings go away. Standing up a little straighter, he told her the truth. "Iris, it is wrong because what you see standing before you," he pointed to his costume; "it's not me; it's not who I am."

She came closer. Confused again, she asked, "What do you mean; what are you saying?" Then it dawned on her. "You do have a name, home, and people who care about you; don't you?" Of course, he does and it made her a little sad that she wasn't a part of it.

"You're very perceptive, but yes, all of that is true." He stared at her then laid bare his soul. "A part of me began to hope," he began.

"What; what did you hope?" She waited with bated breath.

"That you and I outside of this," he started and pointed to his costume again. At her confused expression, he continued, "Don't pretend that you don't know what I'm talking about." He took a deep breath to rein in his frustration.

Iris looked at him; really looked at him. "I don't see how we could, I mean, you're not real; you're just a fantasy." She told him staunchly, although none of that was actually true. Everything would change between them and she didn't know if she was ready for any of it. She stood up straighter. "And besides; what about?" She hesitated.

"You mean Eddie, don't you?" He wasn't surprised she would think of him.

"Well, yes … I care about him."

He had to know. "More than me?"

She wanted to be honest. "I can't answer that."

"Of course you can; just look inside your heart. It will give you the answer that you need."

Bells went off, but she ignored them. "But with Eddie, I have something that I need, I have," she hesitated again.

"A future; was that what you were going to say?"

"Well yes, but if I were with you, you would be out saving the world. I would be at home waiting and wondering if you," she stopped and realized they truly weren't that different.

He grinned a little. "You have a lot to think about." He touched his ear. "I have to go." He looked her up and down, leaving fire in its wake. "Remember what I said."

"I'll remember," she whispered dazed by that look. Then he was gone.

~o~o~

 _Christmas Eve, the West house_ :

Joe, Iris, and Eddie were about to sit down for dinner, but Joe slowly sat back down. Stunned, he sat opposite his daughter and Eddie and he could not believe his ears or his eyes.

"Will you?" Eddie asked again with love and hope in his eyes. The ring box opened before her; the engagement ring shining back at her.

"Eddie, we've never even talked about marriage," Iris said utterly and completely stunned.

"Just think about it Ok?" His cellphone rang. "I have to take this." He went into the kitchen; he put the ring back in his pocket. That went well, he thought.

Joe stood up, but he had to say it. "Tell me you are not going to rush into anything. You barely know Eddie," he whispered urgently.

"Dad, don't do this. I know enough. He's your partner and …"

"Is that all you can say?" Joe asked. The doorbell rang. "I'll get it."

He opened the door and Barry was standing there holding up two bags of Christmas gifts. But before he could even speak, Joe pushed him outside and shut the door.

"Joe, what's going on? Is Iris alright?"

He shook his head. "I'm not surprised you would think of her first."

"What is it Joe? Don't make me think the worst."

He dropped the bomb. "I don't know how to say this." He paused. "Eddie just proposed."

Barry actually staggered back. Joe grabbed his arm and led him over to the bench. He helped him to sit down. "Take a deep breath; that's it."

"I'm too late; always too late," Barry murmured and closed his eyes and tried not to burst into tears.

"It's not too late. She hasn't decided yet and you know why." Joe gave him a look.

"It's because of the Flash; isn't it?" Barry asked knowing the answer.

"Of course, it's because of you. She cut ties with you and she's hurting Barry. She hasn't said anything, but I know Iris. She misses you."

"I miss her too." Barry rubbed his eyes trying to be strong. "I have to show you something." He pulled out a small box from one of the shopping bags. It was wrapped in red with white ribbon.

"Is that what I think it is?" Joe asked shocked and excited. Barry nodded. "Were you going to propose?"

"No, not exactly;" he replied but didn't elaborate.

"Barry, you have to tell her how you feel. If this isn't a defining moment in your relationship, I don't know what is."

The front door opened. It was Iris. "Barry, Dad; why are you sitting out here in the cold? Come inside." She rubbed her arms.

"We're coming," Barry replied. He put the box in his pocket, picked up the rest of his gifts and came inside.

Things were incredibly awkward for dinner, but after the tree was lit, and gifts were exchanged, it was getting late and Eddie decided to leave. Iris kissed him goodnight and promised she would think about his proposal. Eddie told her that he would be working the Christmas shift to make more money, hopefully to plan a wedding, but that he would call her tomorrow afternoon.

Once Eddie was gone, Joe yawned and said his good nights.

Iris shook her head at her Father. "That was subtle," Iris thoughtfully said.

"Iris, we do need to talk," Barry said. He sat down opposite the fireplace. The fire was lit and it gave off a warm glow. The scene was kind of romantic, so they sat that way for several minutes. "This is nice," he commented.

"Yeah, it is. I feel like I can breathe a little. Everything has been like a whirlwind lately."

Barry was curious about that comment. "What do you mean?"

"Barry, I know Dad must have told you about Eddie's proposal," she said and watched him squirm not looking at her. "You don't like the idea of me marrying Eddie either, do you?"

"Is it that obvious?"

"But why; I don't understand?"

He sat up straighter. "Look, Iris, I'm not going to bash your boyfriend, but."

She sighed. "Go on."

"How much do you really know about him?" Out her outraged expression, he continued, "This isn't jealousy talking," he blurted out and realized he probably should not have said that.

Iris's ears perked up. "You're jealous of Eddie; since when?"

Joe was right. This was the moment. "Since that first week after I woke up and found out you were dating him, I could not believe it. Iris, I care deeply about you. I mean," he stopped as he stared at her.

"I care deeply for you too," she admitted.

"But do you love me, Iris, because … I love you very much." She was shocked; he could see it. "Tell me you're not surprised. Surely, you must have had some idea."

She stared at him for a full minute. "I guess; I don't know. I never let myself think of you that way."

"Me neither; and for a long time, I pushed it away. I thought … This is Iris. I've known you forever, it seems, but there were a lot of little things that opened my heart to you. I suppose I should have said something before now, but I'm late, as usual." He shrugged and grinned.

She grinned as well. "Yeah, a little late," she agreed.

Maybe he did have a small chance. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small gift-wrapped box. "Open it."

Iris was completely stunned. Her heart was pounding from dread or excitement; she wasn't sure. "I can't open that."

"Of course you can." He waited for her look at him. "Iris, this isn't a proposal. Just open it."

She frowned. "Alright," she murmured, not sure about this. She opened it and inside the box was another box and it was velvet. She opened it and inside was a lovely platinum wedding band. She gasped and put her hand over her mouth. "How long have you had this?"

"It belonged to my Mom; my Dad gave it to me. Read the inscription."

She pulled it from the box and read it out loud: "Don't hope; Believe."

"I thought it was perfect," Barry said and grinned.

Her eyes were shining. "Barry, it's beautiful, but I can't accept this." She held it out to him.

He refused to accept it. "Just keep it and think about us, you and me, together, just like always, but a little different; well, maybe a lot different." She was staring at the ring as if she believed him; if only just a little. He stood up and helped her to stand. She was so close. He raised her chin. "Think about this too." He leaned down and she did not pull away. Encouraged, he pulled her close and kissed her sweetly. But then he pulled her tighter against him, her arms of their own accord, stroked his hair then her lips parted under his own granting him entrance. Thrilled, Barry slanted his lips across hers and deepened the kiss, his tongue meeting hers in joyful acceptance. After a few minutes, he reluctantly released her lips and rested his forehead against hers.

Both breathing heavily, Iris was a bit stunned by all of this, but Barry had actually kissed her. She didn't know until that moment that she wanted this, more than she should. She had kissed him back without even realizing what she was doing.

"Iris," he whispered her name on a sigh. The way he said her name did things to her just like … Flash!? He smoothed her hair. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Then he was gone.

A few minutes later, her Father came back downstairs. "Oh, is Barry gone?"

"You knew, didn't you?" Iris asked, not surprised her Father knew how Barry felt about her. She stared at the beautiful ring.

"Well, yes, he confessed after I brought it up. He was reluctant, but I've known it for a long time."

Shaking her head, she walked back into the living room and stared at the photographs of her and Barry. "A long time," she murmured and touched the photograph. "Why didn't I see it?"

"Don't beat yourself up about it. Barry was afraid to even speak the truth. He didn't want to lose your friendship. It means everything to him."

"It means everything to me too, but now, everything is different."

"No, not really," he said then cocked his head to the side. "Don't you love him, just a little?"

"How could you possibly ask that? I've always loved him, just not in that way but."

Joe decided not to push her. She had to make up her own mind. "It's late. I'll douse the fire; you go on up."

She kissed his cheek. "Goodnight, Dad. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, sweetie."

Once in her room, still reeling from his kisses and the fact that Barry loves her; really loves her. She touched her lips, thinking of someone else. The Flash's voice, the way he spoke her name came into her head.

_I can't choose one over the other; I can't._

TBC!

~o~o~

Song Inspiration: _Now or Never_ , Josh Groban.

A/N: I have to say that writing this entire chapter was therapeutic for me. That last scene was hopeful and upbeat, but I have no idea what is going to happen with that ring. I'm not the only one who noticed the same music that plays when Flash arrives to speak to Iris. It's very sweet. Anyway, my first thought when I saw the spoiler pics was that he was actually giving his blessing for Iris and Eddie to marry. Would the writers actually do that to us? I can't take much more of this. Barry's talk with Oliver came into my mind. I felt like she could forgive Barry for just about anything. But after what Flash did to Eddie, I didn't see them coming back from that, but they did in my fiction. I do have high hopes for next week's episode. *crosses fingers and toes* I hope it's upbeat and joyful, not sad and depressing. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this. Reviews/kudos is love.


	9. Stay in My Arms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This will be the last chapter. When I began this story months ago, Barry telling Iris how he feels was uppermost in my mind; hence the title of my story. So, she knows; Iris finally knows how he feels. He made me cry; it was so emotional. Everyone knows what Barry was feeling, but what was going through Iris's mind? I'm sure it's been written, but here's my take. Then later, we'll jump into the future. Next month, I'll be joining the Porn Battle challenge to write one shots, and Barry/Iris is definitely on my list. Follow me if you want to catch those. Keep reading and I hope you enjoy this last chapter. Read on! :D

  
[ ](http://s190.photobucket.com/user/babettew54/media/7c390686-5825-43fb-85b1-8050d23ca29b_zpswmxsmfcf.jpg.html)   


_Chapter_ _9: Stay in My Arms  
_

_The_ _West_ _house_ _,_ _nearly_ _two_ _months_ _later_ :

Since Barry's heartfelt confession on Christmas Eve, Iris had thought of nothing else. Barry was hurting, really hurting and honestly, she wasn't much better. Oh, he put on a brave face when they would run into each other, but the pain behind his forced smile broke her heart. She had to take the pain away; and maybe it would help her as well. Nothing was more important than for them to heal, not her meetings with Flash, her blog, her job offers, or even Eddie. It was crucial that they cleared the air between them. Avoiding each other at Jitters, at the station, and even when he visited the house, it was awkward and uncomfortable.

She couldn't bring Eddie over to the house, and she refused to tell him about Barry's feelings. It was between Barry and her and if Eddie knew how he felt, then even more tension would crop up at the station. They worked together and she didn't want to interfere with that.

Although Barry had given his blessing, sort of, she felt guilty because moving in with Eddie had been a horrible mistake. She was hiding the truth from him. She had moved her blog to another website under an assumed name and she removed her photo as well. Once she graduated and started her job, she would move it again. But writing about Flash was passion she would not give up; she couldn't do it, but that wasn't her only lie.

She still felt guilty about her silence during Barry's confession, and now months later, he probably won't speak to her at all, and she wouldn't blame him. Pulling her courage around her, she called him again. It usually went to voice mail and this time was no different.

"Barry; are you there? It's me." Moments later she left a message. "Please call me; we need to talk." A moment then, "I understand why you didn't tell me how you felt. Please just, call me Ok?" She hung up.

Running through town, halfway to STAR Labs, Barry stopped and listened to Iris's voice mail. Don't do it; don't go see her. The few times that they had seen each other, time stopped and they just stood there staring at the other; neither saying a word.

It was time; they couldn't go on like this; not like this. He missed her so much, so, he called her back. They would meet at the house. He changed into his street clothes. But instead of using his key; he decided to knock. What else would change; he didn't know. Should he return the key? He visited Joe of course, but being at the house, there were just too many memories, and when Iris would come over, the awkwardness was palpable.

She opened the door. "Bear, why didn't you use your key?"

He came inside, not looking at her. "It didn't feel right somehow."

"I see," she said. She watched him walk over to the fireplace.

Looking at the photos, of course, he remembered the night he confessed his feelings. "Why did you want to see me?"

She came closer. "Bear, I know what you're thinking," she began. He interrupted her.

"Stop calling me that," he snapped and immediately regretted it. He loved the nickname. "I'm sorry."

She came closer. "It's alright. I meant what I said that I did understand why you didn't tell me, but, look at me Bear, I'm glad you did."

His head came up at that. "You are?"

"Yeah, I am; here let's sit down for a minute."

He was still. "Iris, I don't know … I don't have anything else to say." He paused. "I love you. I do and I can't change the way I feel." He stared into her eyes. "Believe me, I've tried and tried not to love you, but I can't." She was silent. "I'm sorry."

"Oh, Bear, stop apologizing for how you feel," she murmured and tried not to get upset.

He closed his eyes. "I don't want your pity. Just let me go; it's better if we," he couldn't finish.

She stiffened. "You mean, not see each other anymore? Barry, we've tried for months now, but it hasn't worked. I miss you. We have to find a way to," she hesitated.

"Go back to the way things were; I can't do that, Iris. I'm done pretending."

She crossed her arms suddenly very upset. "Well, you acted for years that you didn't love me. Why was it so important that you tell me? What changed? Something must have happened to change your mind." He was silent. "You owe me the truth."

Now he was getting upset. "The truth; you want the truth?"

"Yes, tell me the truth."

He began to walk. _Should I tell her I'm the Flash? No, it won't change anything._

She waited. "I'm listening."

"It was my Father," he finally admitted it.

"When was this?" Iris asked. They usually talked about his visits to see his Dad, but apparently not anymore.

He came closer. "Iris, I found a man in the yellow suit. No, he found me."

"Barry; that's wonderful news, but why didn't you tell me?" She knew how much this meant to him and he needed to know that she was happy for him. She impulsively gave him a hug. Startled at first, then he pulled her close. She closed her eyes knowing these hugs wouldn't happen again; if at all. She awkwardly pulled away. "I'm sorry; I guess I shouldn't do that anymore."

"No; it's Ok." He'd missed their hugs. "Well, once we caught him, he didn't give us any answers; why he killed my Mom. Then we fought but he got away. We've been searching for him since then, but no luck. That night, I felt so horrible not being able to help my Dad that I went to the prison to tell him about the man in the yellow suit then he set me straight on some things."

She frowned. "What things?"

"Mostly about my life since that night and that I shouldn't let the man in a yellow suit take anything more from our family. But that's when he mentioned you." He paused as he stared at her. "He knows, Iris; he knows that I love you."

She understood. "So you talked about me." It was a statement.

"We talked about a lot of things but yeah, mostly about you."

Iris shook her head, but she wasn't that surprised. "When you first told me how you felt, I was upset and terrified."

Confused, he asked, "Why would you be afraid?"

"For the same reasons you were afraid; that we would lose this, and we did, just as you predicted." She walked over to the fireplace and touched a photograph on the mantel.

They truly were on the same page. "I don't think we truly lost it," he said and walked over to her. Standing right behind her, he so wanted to reach out and touch her. She glanced at him over her shoulder and it reminded her of Flash when they first talked. It was so strange, but the feelings were there; she couldn't deny it. But why would she think of him now? Then her heart began to pound. His heart was beating triple time. He then whispered her name on a sigh, "Iris, I know you feel it; don't you?" She was silent; he felt encouraged.

She closed her eyes. He dared to touch her shoulder; she turned to him. He raised her chin, leaned down, eyes closed, and then he kissed her deeply. He clutched her to him tightly. Her arms circled his shoulders. She ran her fingers through his hair. Barry deepened the kiss. His kisses thrilled and excited her, but she needed to think. With a strength she didn't realize she had, she pushed him away but only a little. She slowly opened her eyes and stared at him trying to see the truth.

"What is it?" He whispered then bowed his head afraid she would kick him out for kissing her and never speak to him again.

"It's nothing, I just." She was so confused. She touched her forehead.

He helped her to sit down. "I guess you're still upset?" He sat beside her.

"Yes, I am, Bear, very upset about a lot of things. And now all this talk about the man in yellow, I just; I just don't want you to shut me out, like before Ok?"

"Iris, I promise to keep you informed of the man in yellow, and no more secrets."

She stared at him closely. If he does keep her informed, then she would be closer to Flash. And maybe he'll slip up and sooner or later, he will, and then he'll have no choice but to tell her the truth. "Oh, Bear, I believe you; I do."

Relieved, he whispered, "But you never said why you were so upset after I told you how I felt. For a moment, I thought you never wanted to see me again."

"Oh, Barry; that will never happen." She turned from him and reached for a photograph on the side table. "I remember this picture. You finished college and came home for good. I'll never forget it. We celebrated with wine; well, a lot of wine and," she hesitated.

He wondered where she was going with this story. "I remember the wine and our late night talk that evening."

"We fell asleep on the sofa and Dad found us the next morning. I remember waking up and the way he looked at me was odd."

"I don't remember it," he said.

"You were still asleep. He seemed upset, so I explained that we just had too much to drink and fell asleep."

"He didn't believe you?"

"At first he didn't, and that's when I realized that I had to be more careful when we were alone because … because of my feelings."

He swallowed. "Iris?"

"You probably don't remember, but we kissed that night … a lot, but nothing happened," she urgently replied when he glanced at her in shock.

He closed his eyes and leaned back on the pillows. "Oh, God, what Joe must have thought," he murmured. He was turning red.

"Barry, you're blushing?" She giggled then reached out to touch his chest. "Don't worry; it will never happen again."

He smiled at her glowing face. "It's not funny." He touched her hand over his chest. "But you're right; we have nothing to worry about. I've sworn off intoxicating liquors; we're safe."

Their hearts were beating strongly now. "I don't think we are," she whispered and leaned into him.

"I don't believe so either," he murmured and then they closed their eyes, but just before the lips met, her cell phone rang. "Don't answer that," he whispered and tried to kiss her again.

She reached into her pocket and pulled out her cell phone. "It's Eddie." She answered the call. "Hey, Babe, what is it? Yes, alright, I'll meet you there in an hour." She hung up.

Barry stood up and put some distance between them. "Iris, I," he couldn't finish.

She came over to him and put her arms around him from behind. "I'll move out."

He closed his eyes then turned to her. "Are you sure?"

"I'm very sure; I made my decision weeks ago," she whispered and shook her head at him. She touched his cheek. "After you left me that night, I sat there crying for what felt like hours, and I was mad, Bear, not at you, never at you, but at myself."

"But I don't understand," he said.

"I saw it, but I refused to let myself go there, but I understand now. I didn't want anything to change either." At his apparent confusion, she took his hand. "All during your speech about not telling me all of those times that you had the chance but didn't. I remembered all of those moments as well. It was so clear to me. I cried when you confessed because I knew that all of those times, I had the same chance, but didn't." He squeezed her hand. "The truth has set us free, Bear. You wanted me to know and I wanted you to know as well; it's as simple as that. But you had the courage to say it and I'm so happy that you did." Her eyes watered.

He touched her cheek. "You're amazing and I love you so much."

"I love you too," she said and smiled at him.

He pulled her close, her head on his chest. They stood that way just to hold each other for a good while. They kissed a few times but held their feelings in check. She attempted to leave his arms but he stopped her. "Don't move; stay," he whispered as he stroked and smoothed her hair.

A little later, she walked him to the door. He stood there waiting for something. Then she reached up to touch his chest. "After I move back home, we'll talk again." He looked unsure. "I won't change my mind."

"I just don't want you to regret anything," he said genuinely worried.

"Barry, what can I say that will make you believe me?"

He shrugged. "Just tell me you love me."

She smiled understanding. "I love you, Barry."

He pulled her close. "Say it again," he whispered eyes shining.

"I love you," she said then pulled his head down and kissed him over and over. Minutes later, she had to force him to leave. "Goodnight Bear."

He touched her cheek not wanting to leave her. "Goodnight Iris."

Then he was gone.

~o~o~

 _Four_ _years_ _after_ _that_ _fateful_ _night_ _, Central City Medical Center:_  
  
Iris was in labor about to deliver twins, a boy, and a girl. They had found out a few months ago. She was eight months along, which was a real long pregnancy for twins. There truly weren't any concerns. Well, if you didn't count Barry's altered DNA and whether their children would inherit his speed genes; no problems at all. Dr. Wells seemed pretty confident that they would indeed turn out exactly like their father in that respect.

Iris didn't know what to think. How would she catch them if they ran away from her? If she put a leash of them, people would stare at her as if she had lost her mind. Oh my lord. She was so worried about her children.

Barry reassured her as only he could by making light of their strange situation. He smoothed her hair away from her forehead with a damp cloth. "Honey, you know kids; they won't run away, at least not until their teenagers."

She narrowed her eyes. "That is not helping, Barry. You truly should not tease a woman in labor. You could lose something important." She squeezed his hand and he winced at the pain.

"Sorry honey." He gave her some ice in apology. She accepted it with a look that sent chills down his spine.

Now, six hours later, Iris was pushing her firstborn into the world. It was a boy, and of course, the name was already chosen. His name would be: 'Donald 'Don' Allen.'

"You're doing okay, Mrs. Allen. It shouldn't be long now, just relax for a few minutes, and your daughter will be born shortly," Dr. Wells instructed.

Iris tried to relax then he gave her some more ice. He wiped her forehead with a wet cloth. "Have I told you lately that I love you?"

"No … not in the … past hour," Iris replied and tried to smile.

"I love you, Mrs. Allen."

"That's Mrs. West-Allen, thank you," she quipped and grinned at his expression.

He shook his head at her then leaned over and kissed her forehead.

"This is it, Mrs. Allen, now give me one more push. That's it."

Minutes later, their daughter made her way into the world, weighing in at five pounds and ten ounces, only slighter smaller than her brother, but she didn't cry, not at first. Her Mother lay thoroughly and utterly exhausted but extremely eager to see her children. It took a little time to check them both up.

"Doctor …?" Barry asked, becoming concerned. Then, Don started to cry, more like a wail. He was not happy.

Relieved, Iris and Barry smiled at the sound. "Wow, talk about lungs on that one," Iris commented.

"Humm, I wonder where he got that from," Barry teased.

She grinned. "From you, probably," Iris teased right back.

The nurse brought him over and handed him to his Mother.

"Oh, Bear, he's here," Iris said and then she kissed his little head. "So much hair."

"Now that's from me," he said, extremely proud of his son's head of hair.

Iris shook her head. "Here, your Father wants to hold you." She handed him to her husband. "Just hold him in the crook of your arm, that's it."

Barry held him close to his chest and smiled at his beautiful son. "I have a son," he whispered, eyes watering. He leaned over and kissed his wife again. "Thank you, Iris," he whispered.

"You're welcome," she whispered eyes watering.

A few minutes later, the nurse brought over their daughter. After letting out a wail, she had quieted down. She was so beautiful. Iris stared at her daughter in awe. She kissed her little head.

"Almost done now, Mrs. Allen," Dr. Wells stated.

"She's Ok, isn't she?" Barry asked.

"Yes, but we will check them further. Their lungs are healthy, so that's a definite sign. We'll assess them carefully. It won't take long."

They were both intensely glad to hear that. Once in her room, and surrounded by immediate family and friends: Her Father, Oliver, Felicity, Caitlin, Ronnie, and Cisco, but Dr. Wells explained that their children wouldn't be brought down until later that night.

Disappointed to hear that, but their children were remarkable. They had to be sure that their unique make-up would not be comprised. It meant that they were able to not only breathe on their own, meaning their heart rhythms would not affect their health, but there were a lot of health issues to be considered. They understood, of course.

Much later that night, Barry felt that Iris needed to rest. Their family and friends could visit the babies in the nursery though the newborn window. Everyone left them alone, then Iris awakened hours later, and saw her husband in a chair. "Barry?"

"I'm awake," he said and came over to her. "Do you need anything?"

"Just my children, but where are they?" She sat up and looked around but didn't see them.

"Dr. Wells stopped by a little while ago. They needed to keep them in the nursery a little while longer," he sadly replied.

Her eyes filled with tears at those words. "But what's wrong? I want to see them, please, I need to see them," she exclaimed becoming distraught.

"Alright, let me go get you a wheelchair. Stay put until I get back."

A few minutes later, he came back with a chair. He helped her with her robe then brought her to the nursery. Dr. Wells was with them. Donald and Dawn were not with the other babies but off to one side in special incubators.

Iris grabbed her husband's arm. "Please, we need to know what's happening. Please Barry."

"Alright, we'll go in." Heart pounding and seriously concerned. He knocked on the side door. The nurse knew who he was. "Dr. Wells, is anything wrong?" Barry asked as he wheeled Iris over to the incubators.

"No, they're doing OK. We didn't want to take any chances. We wanted to wait just to be sure they could breathe on their own. Everything checked out: hearing, eyesight, muscles, hearts, lungs, everything appears to be working fine." The nurses removed each of them from the incubators, wrapped them up tight and handed Donald to Barry and Dawn to Iris. Little baby blue and pink hats covered their little heads.

"Hey, sweetie, you gave us a scare, but you're going to be alright." Iris glanced at the doctor. "Thank you," Iris said.

"Yes, thank you, Dr. Wells." Barry paused as he watched his wife holding their daughter. She never looked more beautiful.

"Are you sure they're alright?" She asked Dr. Wells.

"Yes, you can take them home tomorrow," he replied.

"Tomorrow?" Iris and Barry asked at the same time.

"Yes, tomorrow." Dr. Wells smiled at them.

Complete and utter joy filled their expressions. Barry leaned down and kissed his wife sweetly. "I love you, Iris."

"I love you, too." No more words were necessary.

 _The_ _end_ _!_  
  
~o~o~

Song Inspiration: _I Have Nothing_ , Whitney Houston.

A/N: Awww, here's my smile of utter joy. I so loved writing this story. I wanted to thank all my readers for leaving reviews, for chatting with me, for the kudos and favorites. I'm thrilled with the response to this story. I'm also thrilled with WestAllen and how the writers are taking their time to flesh out these characters. I know it will take a while, but I'll be watching! Thank you for reading. HAPPY HOLIDAYS!


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